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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 3386
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker. Certified Professioanl Coach
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In regards ***** ***** that have separated.At what age is

Resolved Question:

In regards ***** ***** that have separated.At what age is it appropriate for the children to spend overnight visits with the non resident parent?
Are there any negative impacts on a young child?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
It is important to set up visits for time spent and include overnights. If the child shows signs of distress then you can always pull back on the sleep overs and just keep it to doing other things for now. Sometimes children could have a hard time sleeping if they are in a different bed with changing frequency so keep a nice routine and try for a weekend night and see how it goes.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Are there any reports that indicate small children under 4 should not spend time with the non resident parent?
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
I don't believe that at all. Are you trying to keep this child from your ex? It is better to have harmonious relationships as that is what will help this child thrive. The child needs love and connection to both of you.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
Or is the child being kept from spending time with you?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
No not at all. We are currently splitting and had a first custody case in which I brought against her. We have two children 2 and 6. The equivalent of "Child Services" was in the room. They gave their opinion that children under the age of 4 have problems later on in life when they stay over night with the non-resident parent.I was hoping to find research or evidence that proves the opposite.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
hmmm. I see. Ask them to cite their references as I am sure there are differing opinions on this. I am of the mind set that it could be okay as long as the child seems to be doing well and not under distress and if they are then making adjustments would be necessary.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
I would minimize it and not make the transition very often but periodically might be better so there is less disruption...that is maybe why they are saying it could be detrimental. Sometimes the regular back and forth can be stressful but a once a month overnight better.
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
routine provides safety and comfort so give that routine and come up with something that can work for all without causing too much disruption. Each child is different and a one size fits all doesn't always apply.
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Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
Something interesting for you to look at. Again there are many differing views but one main theme as I mentioned... providing stability and safety is key and minimizing a lot of back and forth. wishing you the best with all of it. Harmony between all helps. Here is the link. http://www.encyclopedia.com/topic/divorce.aspx

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