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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Parenting
Satisfied Customers: 3615
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker. Certified Professioanl Coach
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My in-laws are toxic and are a bad influence on my 2 sons i

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My in-laws are toxic and are a bad influence on my 2 young sons i believe (Im their dad).They have caused me nothing but stress since i met them 8 years ago. They do nothing but criticise everything we do from the house, to kids, to the car, to money the list goes on. Their 2 daughters are toxic as well and apparently don't like me, so now don't speak to my wife, although there are a load of other issues than just me.But what is worrying me more than anything that my wifes father is into hunting, not for food which i wouldn't mind so much but they seem to shoot anything that moves to let it die as far as i can see, which i find disgusting. Apparently its a sport but i definitely don't see it. he talks about killing this and leaving it dying while laughing.My fear is that my children will want to do this too and i don't want them too. They are only young at the moment 2 and 5 but they will obviously get older and may be talked into it.
I don't like them being there at all to be honest. The father seems nice but turns out he's defintily not.Any advice is appreciated as i have no one else to ask.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Parenting
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.

I am sorry to hear of this strife and for their behavior toward you. I can hear how concerned you are for your young children. You are within your right as a parent that you ask your in laws to refrain from talking about this topic of hunting, or any topic that you deem inappropriate for your children. If they are unable to do so then you will need to think about how your visits with them go. It doesn't have to be contentious when you speak to them you can calmly let them know that is not what you want for your kids and you would appreciate that they respect your wishes around it. Talking to your wife calmly about it as well can help to get her on board. My hunch is that you will say they won't listen to your wishes and then you will be left with the decision about letting them spend time there and you and your wife will need to be on the same page about that.

Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.

I am here when you are available.

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Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Hi, ok thank you for your advice. I will try this.Regards
Steve
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.

I am here again if you need. Be strong, talk with your wife and set the boundaries that feel right for both of you. Be well.