Has his affair ended? It sounds like your son is having a lot of emotions and is able to sense that his father is not doing anything about it so he continues the behavior. Since your husband has asked for another chance with you you can let him know what is important to you in order for things to have a chance and that you want him to be faithful, but you also need him to step up and be a supportive and available father to his children so that they feel loved and supported by both of you. Give him the time to step up and be that man and father but let him know it is not negotiable. If your son continues to act out then I would consider getting him to see a professional face to face to understand what is going on for him so that he stays in school and behaves in a more respectful manner.
Its more than him telling the kids what has happened and more about him stepping up as a Dad. I would sit with him and remind him that he asked for another chance with you and if it is going to work, he needs to be a dad and not walk away and ignore things. I hope he can do it for everyone's sake, but if he can't then yes you will be left with a decision about what to do. In the meantime, I would also suggest that you get your son into counseling to address his behavior.
I am so glad to hear that and keep up with those appointments. I think you are being thoughtful in your approach as to what to do with your marriage. As things progress you will become more and more cler what you want and what will and won't work for you and a decision will come to you.
I think you sound clear and just teasing this out has been helpful and supporting.
If they see and feel stress in the home it can cause fear and stress within and that is why having him and the others talk to someone could be helpful to process it all.
And it sounds like you are getting close to knowing what works for you.
And it takes work to get through a betrayal such as this and if he isn't willing to do the very long and painful work, then things will be very hard for you.
Marital therapy and a lot of continued work needs to be done...you can't force him to do it, so you must focus on what you want and need. If and when you become clear that it is over for you then you go to him with love and honesty about what you need and want and what he has shown you he is willing to do.
Let him know how you feel again and see if he desires change..if not, you sound clear.
Those details you would need to figure out with the help of an attorney. My role here is to tease out what we have and support you.
Be loving and supportive and talk to him about how worried you are for him and want to do what you can to support him and be there for him. He needs space but he also needs your love, support and acceptance.
Wishing you peace with all of this. Please take a moment to click the rating stars...thank you.
wrap him in love. He needs it and so do you.
Thank you in advance for clicking the rating stars.