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Dr. L
Dr. L, Psychologist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 1168
Experience:  Licensed as a Psychologist and Marriage & Family Therapist.
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My girlfriend left me 7 weeks ago after we has a couple of

Customer Question

My girlfriend left me 7 weeks ago after we has a couple of arguments. I shared the house with her and her 2 children - we had been together 2 years! She has now moved herself and the kids to her exes house (the childrens father), I don't believe anything is going on between her and her ex. She has said that she intends to find a place just for her and the kids, but doesn't seem to have done anything yet. She moved all the childrens things over there 2 weeks ago, but has left all her clothes and things here. I still love her very much and desperately want to work things out. I don't know what to make of this! I have only contacted her maybe once a week because I thought it best to give her space, but I seem to be doing all the running. She is being a bit stubbon really about her feeling and is completely focused on getting on and doing right by the kids. She has said she does care, but is just getting on - please help!
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. L replied 3 years ago.

Dr. L :

Hello,

Dr. L :

I would like to help you with your question.

Dr. L :

I am sorry this has happened and I do understand how painful this is. You wrote that you had a couple of arguments. Can you tell me what these were about? Has everything been good up to this point? Did she threaten to leave before these arguments occurred...or was this totally new?

Dr. L :

Have the two of you considered couple's counseling? That certainly might be a way to clear the air and take a hard look at what has happened. A two year relationship is not something to be thrown away without putting some real effort in to discovering what the real issues are and trying to mend them.

Dr. L :

I can understand why you have been giving her space. That's probably a good thing given how abruptly she left. I can also understand why she is protective of the children. That is an important consideration. However, moving them to their father's house only to leave again could be very confusing for them. In addition, they likely had no opportunity to say good-bye to you and, like you, they would need some closure.

Dr. L :

It is strange that she took the children's clothes, but not her own. Do you have any sense of why she did that? Or what she intends to do?

Dr. L :

I await your reply.

Dr. L :

Thanks you.

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