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Ask Dr. Mark Your Own Question

Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 5313
Experience:  Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology helping with relationships
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Hello, can I chat with you right now?

Resolved Question:

Hello,
can I chat with you right now?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Dr. Mark replied 3 years ago.

Dr. Mark :

Hi! I'll be glad to help you with this issue.


Type a hello when you join the chat and we'll get started, okay?

Customer:

Hello

Customer:

Nice meeting you :)

Dr. Mark :

Hi. Share with me what going on.

Customer:

ok. I like one guy and I text him tonight " Miss you terribly" and he replied back "Awww Bless" . I want to know what he actually trying to say to me. does he also have any feelings for me or he just being polite with me?

Customer:

I need your serious opinion

Dr. Mark :

What is your relationship together?

Dr. Mark :

I see you're typing so I'll wait.

Customer:

well, I love him with all my heart, but I tell him about my feelings. I really don't know what he think about me

Dr. Mark :

Does he not share his feelings?

Customer:

we are cousins, and he show me the sign he likes me, but far as I know he has a girlfriend but I don't know they're still together or not, because I live far away from him.

Dr. Mark :

I see.

Dr. Mark :

Have you asked him?

Customer:

we chatting like once twice a week and there always is short conservations

Customer:

well I have asked him one day, do you like someone? and he says "there is someone"

Dr. Mark :

I see.

Dr. Mark :

So it seems that there is someone.

Dr. Mark :

And so he is only is interested in chatting with you and not more. Do you think this is the case?

Customer:

not really. we always talk, like how are you, how's family sometimes he telling me about his work. but last week, he texts me, hey how are you - Misses talking to you and thought I'd text. do you think that's mean, he has a feelings for me?

Dr. Mark :

Well, he says there is someone. So if he has feelings for you, it would mean that he's trying to play 2 women at once.

Dr. Mark :

Would it not?

Customer:

well, they might broke up, you never know

Dr. Mark :

Oh, I misunderstood: I thought he told you this recently.

Dr. Mark :

When did he say that he has someone?

Customer:

he has got my two mobile numbers, so he asking me other day, hey which ones your number, I got both. than I replied back and told him my numbers and tell him " you only got my numbers nobody else" and he says "really aww sweet"

Customer:

3 month ago

Dr. Mark :

Oh, that is a long time.

Customer:

yeh

Dr. Mark :

How about texting and asking if he's still with someone?

Dr. Mark :

and maybe adding, that you hope he's not...

Customer:

well we don't talk too often, and when we do we always do casual talk. so its hard to ask him this kind of questions

Dr. Mark :

I see. Yes, that is awkward.

Dr. Mark :

When will you be back in the same country as him?

Customer:

also has telling that day when I ask him do you like someone, so he says, there is someone - best person for my parents and myself - that's what the person should be. can you explain me, what he actually was trying to say to me?

Dr. Mark :

It sounds more like he said he has someone for YOU, doesn't it?

Customer:

we living in same country, but different town. he texts me a week ago he will comedown to my house in Appril

Customer:

so basically he's trying to say me, he like the other girl

Dr. Mark :

Ah, that is good.

Dr. Mark :

That he will be there in April.

Customer:

I think so.

Dr. Mark :

I know it feels like a long time

Dr. Mark :

But he is being very unclear, indeed.

Customer:

he was visited our house in 2012

Dr. Mark :

He is not saying his intentions and you are not confident to ask him what his intentions are

Dr. Mark :

so his visit in April will be very important as an opportunity to clear the air, agreed?

Customer:

well I text him today, miss u terribly and all he says Awww bless. so what do you think, what he trying to indicated of saying this. does he have any feelings for me you think?

Customer:

i'll try to ask him, whenever I meet him

Dr. Mark :

You see, the problem is that his comment of Aww bless is not committal,

Dr. Mark :

it does not state clearly what his intentions are.

Customer:

what does Awww bless really mean?

Dr. Mark :

It means, "That's so nice".

Dr. Mark :

And you see, that's so nice doesn't tell us what he feels, agreed?

Customer:

I see

Customer:

last week he texts me, he misses talking to me, he never said anything likes before, this was the first time he message me something like this

Dr. Mark :

Right. It is hard to know if he is shy and wants to say he is interested; or if he is playing with you because he already has a girl and you're far away.

Dr. Mark :

What do you think he is like?

Dr. Mark :

Is he rather shy?

Dr. Mark :

Or is he more the type of man who would play with your feelings?

Customer:

he is a decent guy. we may not meet often but he's really close to our family, he's really really close with my younger brothers, they talk they chat everyday and also he has good connection with my sisters family. he often went my sisters houses and stayed over. so..

Dr. Mark :

Well, I'd like to be very honest with you:

Dr. Mark :

I don't think you will know for sure until you see him face to face.

Dr. Mark :

Therefore, it may be most worthwhile for you

Dr. Mark :

since you think he is a decent person

Customer:

well when I meet him, he show me the sign he likes me

Dr. Mark :

when you meet you need to ask him straight:

Customer:

hopefully

Dr. Mark :

if he is interested in you romantically.

Dr. Mark :

because it's been a long time already, agreed?

Customer:

I have a gut feelings yes, but I really don't sure. the problem is, he has girlfriend before he met me. we're cousins this is true, but we met like 2 years ago. he stayed our house one week and I stayed his house one week.

Customer:

but I'm sure he likes my company

Dr. Mark :

That you're so far away makes it a very slow process and there is not way

Dr. Mark :

it seems

Dr. Mark :

to make things move faster because of the distance.

Customer:

first time probably a year ago, one day I text him and call him baby and he replied back " excuse me lol - I'm not your baby.

Customer:

than I tell him sorry and he said, It's Ok. don't get upset, it's ok. you can still texts me, you meant well

Dr. Mark :

Oh, that sounds like he wasn't romantically interested.

Dr. Mark :

Agreed?

Customer:

and that time whenever I texts him, sometimes he reply back sometimes he was doesn't. and he also never texts me first that time.

Dr. Mark :

You are such a nice person, and I know you want me to tell you my honest opinion.

Dr. Mark :

So far,

Customer:

but now things are change. now he often texts me first

Customer:

ofcourse

Dr. Mark :

it seems from what you've written that he wasn't interested romantically.

Dr. Mark :

There is a chance that this is changing

Dr. Mark :

or there is a chance that he is lonely

Dr. Mark :

and is interested as a friend only.

Dr. Mark :

This is a 50% to 50% possibility, very even:

Dr. Mark :

that he may becoming intersted

Dr. Mark :

OR

Dr. Mark :

he is only wanting a friend.

Dr. Mark :

So, you need to either ask him which

Dr. Mark :

or wait till he comes to see you and then it will be easier to tell.

Customer:

do you think he's broke up with his girlfriend? one day he was tellings me, I told her (his girl friend) about you also, she likes the sound of your family. and than I ask him - what did you tell her about me? and he said, hey only good things, how u r, theres only good things to say. you worth too much. I gift him a mobile phone about 2 month ago.

Customer:

he also tell me, he will marry this year

Dr. Mark :

It does not sound from what you have just written that he has broken up with her. Do you agree?

Customer:

and my family also pressured me for marry. they kept looking for my guy but I really like him and don't want to lose him.

Dr. Mark :

Then here's what you have to do:

Dr. Mark :

you need to not panic right now.

Dr. Mark :

If you have a chance of getting him to be interested in you, then

Customer:

he was telling me this, that day I ask him he's like someone or not?

Dr. Mark :

again: you need to not panic right now.

Dr. Mark :

here's what you have to do:

Dr. Mark :

If you have a chance of getting him to be interested in you, then

Customer:

I have to marry this year if not definitely next year. so I'm so upset about this

Dr. Mark :

I understand.

Dr. Mark :

That is a lot of pressure on you, isn't it?

Customer:

yeah

Customer:

please pray for me

Dr. Mark :

I shall indeed!

Dr. Mark :

But if you want to try to make it be him,

Dr. Mark :

then you must keep having pleasant texts with him

Dr. Mark :

and try to make sure you see him in April

Dr. Mark :

or sooner if you can.

Dr. Mark :

Because only in person do you have a chance of

Dr. Mark :

getting him interested in you

Dr. Mark :

romantically.

Customer:

I want to text him often but I feared he might think I'm annoying

Dr. Mark :

So, then, don't text too often. that's not a good thing.

Dr. Mark :

Just be friendly.

Dr. Mark :

And pray as well for yourself.

Customer:

when he was telling me there is someone, that day I text back and tell him - I'm sorry, I tell you everything about my feelings without knowing your situations, and he didn't reply back anything, I still wonder why?

Customer:

I always pray

Dr. Mark :

He may not have realized that you were seriously interested in him.

Dr. Mark :

Until you said that.

Dr. Mark :

And so he didn't know what to respond.

Dr. Mark :

But that was a good thing.

Customer:

I see

Dr. Mark :

Because if he's going to become interested, he needs to

Dr. Mark :

know that you are interested.

Dr. Mark :

So now that he knows, stay calm because you need for him to see you in person for things to advance, okay?

Customer:

one thing I don't understand, if he really likes the girl and wants to marry her, why he said, best person for my parents and myself that's what the person should be. far as I know, his family accepted the girl he like, so why he's telling me this?

Dr. Mark :

He may be saying that he wants you to like whoever he marries because he wants to stay friends. That is the most common reason to say that.

Customer:

so he confused about relation with that girl you think?

Dr. Mark :

There is no way to say for sure because he has not been very clear and he is texting you more right now.

Dr. Mark :

So, stay hopeful, don't text too often, and prepare for when you two meet together again, okay?

Customer:

ok

Customer:

thanks for your advice and nice meeting you. if I need any help I will contact you again. bye for now. have a good night :)

Dr. Mark :

Okay, I wish you the very best!


 


My goal is for you to feel like you've gotten Great Service from me. If the answer has been helpful, please remember to give a rating of 5 (Great Service) or 4 (Informative and helpful), or even 3 (Got the job done) button. This will make sure that I am credited for the answer and you are not charged anything more than the deposit you already made by pressing any of these buttons. Bonuses are always appreciated! If we need to continue the discussion for that to happen, then please feel free to reply and we'll continue working on this. If I can be of further help with any issue now or in the future, just put "For Dr. Mark" in the front of your new question, and I'll be the one to answer it. All the best, XXXXX XXXXX

Customer:

last questions? should I text him back anything when he says Awww Bless?

Customer:

I will.

Dr. Mark :

How about, "thanks, XXXXX XXXXX you as well. I'm looking forward to seeing you in April"

Customer:

what does it mean?

Dr. Mark :

Share with me what is unclear.

Customer:

I understand now

Customer:

no problem

Customer:

bye and good night :-)

Dr. Mark :

Good night, I wish you the very best!


 


My goal is for you to feel like you've gotten Great Service from me. If the answer has been helpful, please remember to give a rating of 5 (Great Service) or 4 (Informative and helpful), or even 3 (Got the job done) button. This will make sure that I am credited for the answer and you are not charged anything more than the deposit you already made by pressing any of these buttons. Bonuses are always appreciated! If we need to continue the discussion for that to happen, then please feel free to reply and we'll continue working on this. If I can be of further help with any issue now or in the future, just put "For Dr. Mark" in the front of your new question, and I'll be the one to answer it. All the best, XXXXX XXXXX

Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 5313
Experience: Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology helping with relationships
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