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Hello, I am Rafael. Thanks for asking your question - I'm here to support you. (Information posted here is not private or confidential but public).
I am sorry to know about this frustrating situation.
Could you please what you mean when you say he feels he should attend while she is in the hospital?
How has such event changed your relationship?
You are in a committed relationship, aren't you, the same way as she is, right?
Then which are the issues now created by his behaviors that are concerning you this much? Has he been inconsistent with the promises he made and agreements you have? Please tell me more about it so I could better understand your situation.