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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3527
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Professional Coach
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i slept with my friends ex and i dont know what to do.if i

Resolved Question:

i slept with my friend's ex and i dont know what to do.if i should tell her or not
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  Shantal-Mod replied 3 years ago.
Hello,

I'm Shantal and I'm a moderator for this topic.

We have been working with the Experts to try to help you with your question. Sometimes it may take a bit of time to find the right fit.

I was checking to see if you had already found your answer or if you still need assistance from one of the Experts.

Please let me know if you wish to continue waiting or if you would like for us to close your question?

Thank you,

Shantal
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

i have not gotten an answer yet and i still need assistance so i would be willing to wait. thanks. but i would want a reply pretty soon though

Expert:  Shantal-Mod replied 3 years ago.
Hello,

Thank you for getting back to me. We will continue to look for a Professional to assist you.

Thank you for your patience,

Shantal
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 3 years ago.
Hi and welcome. I'm a Licensed Master Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families on a variety of issues.
There are many variables to this question and the answer. How close are you with this friend? How close are you still to the guy?
I am all for open and honest communication and believe that thee things have a way of coming out and better to be proactive rather than have to deal with it after she has found out. I think it is also important that you look within to see why it happened and if there was really anything wrong with what you did. If the two of you had an interest in each other why not pursue it?

I don't know that your relationship can survive her knowing and I truly hope it will...but it sounds to me that it is eating you up a bit and you have the desire to tell her. Am I accurate about this? If so, then again I am all for being open and letting her know why it happened and if you feel sorry for doing so then let her know that. Give her the time to process it and have her reaction...it may be nothing.

Let me know your thoughts.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hi Jen,


tnx for ur reply, the thing is we slept with each other when he broke up with her. and he wanted us to start dating but we were friend's before it happened .it all happened so fast. she still loves him but he claims he loves me and not her anymore.....so i dont want to look like the worst friend ever by going out with him.cos i know she would be hurt and am just so confused

Expert:  TherapistJen replied 3 years ago.
If you want to date him i am not sure there is a way to avoid it all. You are not in an easy spot and i feel for you but the best thing is to figure out what you truly desire and then work toward that and if it means having a hard conversation with her you just might have to do it. Spend some time figuring out what you really want and if he is truly a man for you and you can see a future with him then you will have to advocate for what you want.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

ok, thank you very much...i'll think about it and would tell her and let you know her reply.tnx

Expert:  TherapistJen replied 3 years ago.

Yes take the time you need to figure it all out. I am here when you need. Please take a moment to offer a rating of my support. I am only credited for my time if you do so. Thank you in advance.

TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3527
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Professional Coach
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