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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3245
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Professional Coach
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Hey what should you do if you really love somebody, But they

Resolved Question:

Hey what should you do if you really love somebody, But they do not seem interested to compromise to meet you half way. We both have a son mine 5 from a previous relationship hers just 2. I love them to bits but I only get to see her Monday and a Saturday. She plays netball on a Tuesday, recently started a new job working Wednesday & Friday evening 5-10 then 7-1 on a Sunday morning. she also attends Thai Boxing with her ex on a Thursday evening while I babysit Riley their son.
I try to understand and believe things will improve and do my best to be supportive, but after a while I end up getting so frustrated as it feels like I am just a baby sitter as and when required. I have called it off with her and tried to make things right. totally lost ?
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 2 years ago.
and welcome. I'm a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 20 years experience working with individuals and families on a variety of issues.

The experience you describe is not an uncommon one with young kids, a new job, your work life and an ex.....things can feel scattered and chaotic which could leave you feeling alone and frustrated.

These are the times when you need to put things into place where time together can be spent...annoying to have to schedule it, but if not, life gets in the way. It sounds like you both love and care other so you both need to work harder to cultivate time alone! Pick one night or afternoon where it is just the two of you night and make it happen no matter what. I am not sure I hear that she won't compromise but rather a very busy life of you and schedules getting in the way of you truly connecting.

So, talk to her..let her know you miss her and want to spend time together and want to create a weekly event/outing just two of you.

If at that point she is not desirous or not moving toward connecting then yes evaluating whether this is the right relationship would be something to do.

How does that sound?
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3245
Experience: Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Professional Coach
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