Thanks for your response.
I guess what I would like is a way to still be his friend but keep it at a friend level. This is not easy - our connection is strong.
Recently I made the decision and didn't see him for a few weeks. Or go over and just meet other places But then when we saw each other we got close again. He just gets in my head...and i miss love..Its really strange he is always there for me- well except the wining and dining etc hehe - he just does it all from home.
I think we both really deeply care about each other. I am trying to be understanding about his situation but my life is very stressed out as well. I have all these doctors visits all the time I can barely manage my pain and being with him I just feel protected and he is so funny
Im getting more sick and more unwell because it is mentally and emotionally unstable the way it is though. On and off on and off - back and forth. Then he jokes and says when u dont see me you get sick..and he always teases me about how I like being treated well and go out with her man. I guess all this teasing may mean he is insecure and trying to put the pressure on me.
He knows about other guy friends etc - but then again do I stop telling him? He said he was disappointed when I told him about another guy I liked - and how I go on dinners with guy friends. But what can I do?
I miss life and he just likes to do it all in the house - eat etc.
At one point I thought he just wants a casual sex partner.
But he doesn't.
I guess that's why I love him a lot - he has always been there for me.
But I feel guilty even though I have been honest with him about other people who are interested and how they want to take me out etc.
Well its all messy. Maybe im lonely - maybe im not - how do I know if I should give it a go?
But mainly where should I draw the line with disclosing information.
Anything I say even if im catching up with a guy friend - for dinner. Hell start going on about you love your dinners etc. Your need this you need that. He laughs but he over does it. I cant have conversations with him because he takes everything to another level. Guess that's his issues and stuff. Then he asks if I kissed him.
Anyway sorry for this crazy detail. I just wish things were easier . but were all human and no body wants to be lonely