yes please. I just wanted to talk as a one off.
I can hear how daunting it is and how you give over...each time you do you are losing more and more of you. Where are you? Do you matter? I think so which is why I encourage you to dig deep and know what you want and deserve.
I feel for you and what you are up against. Please take the time to know what you want and ask for it. And if he can't do it, then you are left with a decision about how you want your life to be moving forward.