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TherapistJen
TherapistJen, LCSW, CPC
Category: Relationship
Satisfied Customers: 3497
Experience:  Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Professional Coach
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Ok, I will try to say my sad story here. I have met a wonderful

Resolved Question:

Ok, I will try to say my sad story here. I have met a wonderful guy two years before during summer holidays, had a brief relationship with him afterwards, and then without any explanation, he vanished into thin air. I kept calling him to tell me what has gone wrong but no reply, and months later he just sent me a msg that his father was ill. Last summer I saw him during holidays again, accidentally, and he told me that his father passed away, but he was still distant. We kept some contact but I never understood why we separated and always hoped that we could be together again. Thing is, he has also told me that he's got together with his ex-girlfriend and I feel so low ever since (last December). He had sent me a msg over fb telling me that he's in a relationship now and that I should not be sad because we are still friends and will meet again at some point!!! it was the most painful thing to hear. I feel so hurt, so disappointed and hopeless, but I just saw he put "like" on my fb post and some days ago sent a video, I mean, why does he bother with me anyway??? What does he want? I just can't get over the fact that he only sees me as a friend and I don't want to keep on talking to him, as if nothing is going on!!! You see, I just have the feeling that he is still interested, but I am not sure. I am also too jealous of him and his ex. What should I do anyway? this troubled relationship keeps draining me.
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Relationship
Expert:  TherapistJen replied 1 year ago.
So sorry to hear of this pain for you. As hard as it is, the best thing is for you to try and heal from this...he is now with someone else and keeping in contact with him seems to be giving you more pain. It works for him to have you as his friend so he can have it both ways and also maybe not feel bad for not going further with you. But, he has been distant since you met and has come in and out of your life and that is telling...and could be his pattern. There is no fast way to move through this pain, but you will get through it. Him liking things on FB is easy for him because in his mind you are friends, but in yours, you want more. He may also be keeping you hanging a bit to see if things work out with his ex and if they don't he can come back to you, but again there are no guarantees that he would stay and not become distant again. I know it is hard, but healing from this takes time, but you can do it.
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