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Thank you for reaching out to just answer. I really do count it an honor and huge responsibility to try to help you find resolution to your situation.
I am so sorry you are in this situation. You say that you have been single for fifteen years and really want to make this work. Please understand you are there and see the situation first hand and I am on the outside looking in. My first impression is he is using you. If he cared for you he would communicate with you and let you know how much he cares.
You are correct in not trying to force him into a relationship. That relationship would not be good. If you still aren't sure you want to give him up, there is nothing wrong with an ultimatum though. Just tell I'm you want more from him. You would like to talk to him more often and for him to treat you with more respect.
My personal opinion is though, you are better of without him. You are evidently healthy and pretty. You have much to offer. You are too good to set around waiting on his bidding.
Does that make sense? I know that is a bit harsh, but from what I am seeing, it is the truth. I hope it all works out. Let me know if there is anything else I can do to help.
I'm sorry you are being treated this way. It sounds like you have a good plan. The question you must answer yourself is how long you are willing to wait on him. I hope the best for you.
The problem with daryl is he is a cheat and a user. It is not you and there is no other answer than him being a jerk. My advice to you is to slow down. Take a break from guys all together. Prove to your self you don't need a boyfriend. Give it time and see if the right guy comes looking for you. No offence, but I believe providence is a better match maker than you are. At least give it a try. Does that make sense?