If you and your ex rely on each other than it seems okay to do so...as long as you are both open and comfortable with one another to do so. How is she feeling about it?
And why are you going back to her to discuss it all? Do you have others you can share it with? Even though it is 3 years since you are not together, there may be lingering feelings and that could come into play here.
And it is not the length of time in a relationship it is the feelings in it and even if your most recent one was shorter does not mean you can't have a lot of feelings such as sadness and loss around it. Comparing the two doesn't help you because they are different in every way.
and that's great if it works for you but it sounds like there are still some unresolved feelings there if she is saying things to you like you can't compare the two...feel what you feel and let it all out and healing will begin.
Ok so you get a lot from the ex and her telling you that you are being ridiculous is helpful, then go for it and rely on her to get you through.
trust your gut too. If it doesn't feel right then walk away and begin your healing process.
Let me know how else I can support you. If all good for now, please click on the stars to rate my support. Thanks so much in advance.
Yes and that its what I was saying that she is feeling a lot of emotion too so go gently and be the great friends that you are and will remain.
And I wish you a great day too and if you would click the stars for me, I would appreciate it so that I may receive credit for my support.