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JGM, Solicitor
Category: Scots Law
Satisfied Customers: 11154
Experience:  30 years as a practising solicitor.
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I am writing on behalf of my daughter who has been

Resolved Question:

I am writing on behalf of my daughter who has been split up from her husband for 3 months now.
She now has a place of her own with the children, and initially it was agreed he could have them a Thursday, Saturday and Sunday one week, and Wednesday, Thursday, Saturday and Sunday the alternative week. That was before things were put into practice.
She is finding things very disruptive for the children( 8 & 18months)and wants them to have more routine and stability as the baby doesn't know where her bed is and has sleep problems.
He refuses to agree to the new suggested days, which is every weekend(fri-mon morning) holidays , and any days off he has and the children are free.
She has been one very upset, and doesn't know where she stands or where she goes from here.
Can you advise please? Should she start a formal separation, go to a solicitor etc
Thank you
Mhorag ****
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Scots Law
Expert:  clairep80 replied 1 year ago.
HiThank you for your questionMy name is ***** ***** do my best to help you but I need some further information firstWhich part of the Uk is she in - and what alternative arrangement does she want to suggest
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Hello Claire,Apologies for not seeing your reply, and thank you for your response.She is in Aberdeen, and she is offering him the same amount of time, but from a Fri after his work - to dropping them off at school/ nursery on a Monday morning. Which in itself seems generous to me as the whole point is that they have a structured school and nursery routine.Hope this helps, but please let me know if you need more information.RegardsMhorag
Expert:  clairep80 replied 1 year ago.
I shall opt out and transfer you to the correct section
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Sorry, I don't understand? Can you clarify the meaning of the above please? Am I being directed to someone else? Will my question be answered soon?Thank you.Mhorag
Expert:  Nicola-mod replied 1 year ago.
The Expert's opinion is that your question should be answered under Scots law. I have moved the question for you and alerted our Scots law Experts to the fact that you are waiting.
Thank you for your patience,
Expert:  JGM replied 1 year ago.
Thank you for your question.
I am a solicitor in Scotland and will help you with this.
The law says that parents have to act in the best interests of their children. It is apparent that it was initially thought that a shared care type arrangements would satisfy this. However, practice has dictated that this will not work and that it has a destabilising effect on the children. That is often the case with that type of arrangement. The courts know that. Your daughter's husband, however, doesn't want to accept that is the case. He certainly won't accept it from your daughter.
The answer to your question is that your daughter should see a solicitor who can write to the husband and ask him to see his own solicitor so that some kind of contact arrangement which is the best interests of the children can be reached. Your daughter suggests every weekend. I'm not even sure that that arrangement will work as your daughter, and indeed the children, will start to want to have some weekends together as the children develop and start to have activities of their own, which I am sure the eight your old is starting to do.
That is why a dialogue between solicitors would be appropriate in this situation; so that the available options can be explored and an arrangement made that is in the best interests of the children. If arrangements can't be worked out then the next stage would be that a court would have to intervene. That option is not one which should be considered unless absolutely necessary from the point of view of both upset and expense.
I hope this helps. Please leave a positive response so that I am credited for my time.
JGM, Solicitor
Category: Scots Law
Satisfied Customers: 11154
Experience: 30 years as a practising solicitor.
JGM and other Scots Law Specialists are ready to help you