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UKfamsol, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 560
Experience:  Very experienced specialist family law solicitor, qualifed in 1994
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Ive been involved in a dispute with my ex wifes partners

Customer Question

I've been involved in a dispute with my ex wife's partners and ended up being arrested all because my ex broke the court order. Now social services are involved and seem to have take her side even though her partner started the fight. Has she the power to over ride the court order that the judge set out because my ex is now telling her I can't pick the kids up and I need to sort out another person to do this. I have nobody to do this so the social worker has said she will suspend my weekend with them and I am not happy about this at all.
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  UKfamsol replied 4 years ago.
Hello and thanks for your question. I need a bit more information before I can answer.
When was the court order?
What did it say about the contact between you and the children?
Have you been charged with any offence?
Are you subject to police bail, and if so, what are the conditions?
When is the next court hearing, and what will that hearing be for?
How long have social services been involved with the family?
How/why did social services become involved?
Was the court case started by social services?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.


Court order September 2013
Contact every other weekend Friday 6.30pm till Sunday 6.30pm
No charge
Bail till 17th jan 2014 only condition is no contact with her partner
No next court hearing
Social only been involved since dispute
Other questions irrelevant
Expert:  UKfamsol replied 4 years ago.
Hello and thanks for the extra information.
Obviously, it's important that you do not breach the bail conditions. You need to give social services a copy of the court order and explain that it's important for the children that they continue to see you regularly. You need to suggest to the social services and to your ex a way for you to collect the children without coming into contact with your ex's partner. If your ex is now saying that she also doesn't want to have any contact with you, it would be helpful if you could suggest someone to act as a go-between that would be acceptable to both you and your ex eg a mutual friend or a family member. This is usually difficult to do - but not impossible - as not many people want to be involved in someone else's family dispute. Another option is to have the handover at a neutral venue in a public place so that your ex can feel safe eg outside a police station or at a railway station or bus stop or MacDonalds.

If you can agree changes to the arrangements set out in the court order, then put it in writing and both sign it, each keep a copy and give a copy to social services. A court order regarding contact can be changed by agreement of both parties - as long as that agreement is genuine and neither side feels bullied.

Ultimately, if you cannot reach agreement, then you can take her back to court. The court will consider whether the court order should be changed along the lines I have set out above, or whether the order should stay the same and be enforced and/or there should be more involvement by social services and/or Cafcass.

As you already know, going to court is stressful, time-consuming and expensive, so I would strongly advise you to do your best to negotiate a solution if at all possible.

It might help if you went to mediation, This is a round-the-table discussion with a trained and neutral mediator, whose aim is to help the parties reach a compromise that is acceptable to both, and workable, and meets the needs of the children ie to see their father regularly.

Here's where to find a family mediator in your area:

If that doesn't work, and you need some assistance in bring the case back to court, I would strongly recommend getting some face-to-face legal advice from a specialist family law solicitor - here's where to find one:-

I hope this helps and I wish you the best of luck.

I hate to specify - but please rate my answer ok, good or excellent - or I get nothing for my time!!! (so the website keeps all).)

Thanks and best wishes...
Expert:  UKfamsol replied 4 years ago.
Hello - I see that you have read my answer but not accepted it. Is there anything you need further clarification on? Or do you feel that there is any part of your question that I have not answered? Please let me know, and I will do my best to answer more fully.

Otherwise, I would be grateful if you would now accept my answer so that I can be credited for my time.

Thanks and best wishes.