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James Mather
James Mather,
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1390
Experience:  Senior Partner at Berkson Wallace
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Hi I am a single dad of 7 years. My son is now 13 and has lived

Customer Question

Hi I am a single dad of 7 years. My son is now 13 and has lived with me from day one of my splitting with my now ex-partner. Here is my story and I am wanting to know, how much influence ie my son's wishes have, if my ex partner starts being aggressive in her intent for my boy to live with her..

My ex partner and I split, 7 years ago, my son came to live with me from day 1. I have devoted my life to this responsibility and it's only in the last couple of years, that he has had a functional relationship with his mum, who he sees at her mum and dad's house, every friday now (overnight). she doesnt drive or have her own house, but is in the process of moving in with boyfriend number 3 (in 4 years). My son is 13 and he is really uncomfortable with being pressurised to go to this boyfriends house by his mum, he has been through a lot and am very concerned. To be fair, my ex partner's previous relationships, were put under pressure, because my son wouldn't go to the boyfriends houses, the only way it would work, would be for her to go to her parents and stay there with him.. i have however, noticed a real ratcheting up, of pressure on my boy of late, my ex partner is talking ill of me, where we were always amicable before. i know whats happening here. she is worried that my boy and having to go over to her parents all the time, to see our son, will end her current relationship. her partner is never away from her, even when our son is over seeing her, when i turn up and am civil, i am getting some pretty ignorant ill mannered treatment. am feeling really let down here, there was a time when my son said to me, in the early years, "dad is there any way you could see if mum will spend more time with me" then i spoke to her and told her straight, that she needed to get her priorities right.things improved slowly there, we had always been amicable and worked well together, with our son's interests and welfare in mind. so now, i am feeling a blatant game going on here and my boy is coming home saying he hates being told all the time, why not go over to this boyfriend's house. i just wan't to be prepared and understand what i can do here? aware that things change but at this most sensitive time, where he is entering puberty, i just want to make sure, HIS wishes are heard and i can defend them.. my ex partner and her new boyfriend clearly have a full time responsibility in mind
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 4 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare and I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Why was he never willing to go to his mother's home?
Expert:  Nicola-mod replied 4 years ago.

Just a quick reminder, there is an information request here from the Expert. This means they need to know more details before they will be able to give you a full answer.

Thank you,