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Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 35054
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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me and my wife split up 3 years ago and she moved 300 miles

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me and my wife split up 3 years ago and she moved 300 miles away to devon to live with her mum.recently i found out she has had a baby and kept it secret from me.i have a strong feeling the baby is mine and does not want me to be a part of the babies life.

We have another child 15 i have custody of.

If the baby is mine should i apply for custody as what she has done is not right and against the babies interest in life?
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
What makes you think that the baby is yours?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

My wife was working and paying child maintenance to our other daughter to me .CSA was involved.


Through CSA recently i found out she left work on maternity leave on 12th July 2012,11 weeks before due date.Baby was due end of september.


Me and my wife were together on the 3rd,4th and 5th of January 2012 which works out 27 weeks to 12 July 2012.The possibiltiy is there unless she was sleeping with another man at the same time .


I do not want to live with a possibility i may have a child.i want to make sure so as to provide for the baby in best possible way .


Last may i found out about this and asked my wife if i am the father and she changed her number straight away and since i have no idea where she is or how to contact her.

Have you started divorce proceedings at all?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Yes ,i did back in June 2011 .All papers were signed by me ,she took them away to sign but never signed them .


We agreed to reconcile December 2011/January 2012 hence the dates we were together.

She refused to divorce me after February 2012

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

We could not reconcile our marriage because she became very odd after February 2012 and it became impossible to make any sense of her actions

Customer: replied 4 years ago.



I have something further to add.We have another daughter who is 18 and does not live with either of us,she lives in Devon,a couple of miles from her grandmothers where my wife was living.

Even though she lives 2 miles from her own mother she didn't know anything about the baby either.


I have a fear about the circumstances now,why would this baby be kept so secret and is the baby kept un-necessarily even un-lawfully indoors.


If the baby was kept so secret and indoors so as not to be seen i feel its disturbing and fear for the safety of the baby under the circumstances.


I need to know what to do next

The starting point is to discover if there was a live birth.
This can be done by checking the Registers - if you do not feel able to do it an Enquiry Agent should be able to do it for about £100 or so
Once you have the details then you can apply to the court for a defined contact order - and within that ask for a DNA test
If the child is yours then you can seek Parental Responsibility and check with the Health Visitor whether or not there are any issues.
Clearly contact will be an issue given the distance - but if you are willing to travel then there is no reason why you should not start to build a relationship with the child
A change of Residence is unlikely unless there are clear safeguarding issues regarding her care of the child
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare and other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Yes there was a live birth but I dont know the date of birth.


I only know from csa the baby was due end of September 2012 but she could have been early and had heath issues at birth maybe because she was an early birth.

I have nothing to go on as my wife and her side of the family do not talk to me or our other two daughters and refuse to do so.


The only reason I have credible to claim residence is how bad a mother she was to our other two kids .


Also more importantly I do have a horrible feeling the baby had health issues as she was rushed to hospital at some stage.

My wife,her mother and baby live in a tiny one bedroom bungalow and they both chain smoke.

Could this be a reason for an order or am I being too optimistic ?