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Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34902
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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After divorce

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Hi, my wife and I seperated 3 years ago I left the house with nothing as we have a 9 year old daughter, we had a contact arrangement that worked around our work schedule, but not long after she quit work altogether now I work 30 miles away from the school so it was agreed that I'd finish work early if she was to work and I'd pick up my daughter and have her overnight, and so on, now of course I'm losing money with finishing work early and I'm getting complaints from my manager, but since she finished work and lives half a mile away from the school it would make sense for her to pick our daughter up from school and I'd pick her up from home at 4-5oclock save me losing pay and maybe my job, but she refuses, telling me what was firstly agreed, now as far as I'm concerned she broke the agreement by quitting her job and also I have in writing she is stopping me from seeing her if I don't pick her up from school.
In the end I gave up fighting and have since met somebody else, now she's figured this and has decided to take me to court to enforce me when and where I should see our daughter. Makes me sick.

The other thing is my partner lives overseas so can this also stop me from emigrating if I choose to do so?

Yours Mr P
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Do you mean that she has actually issued a Court application - or just that she has threatened to do so?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Hi there, she actually has I received a letter informing me there's a hearing on the 24th of April
What is she specifically applying for?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
As I understand a defined contact order
What contact pattern do YOU want - and what is there at the moment?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Well the pattern moment is I have my daughter every other weekend with alternate Wednesday and Mondays, but I can't keep losing money and risk of my job to keep finishing early to collect her from school. Whilst her mother is only sat around the corner.

In the long run I am looking at emigrating to canada, I've recently got engaged and we will be sorting out at date for our marriage when I go over next month.

I just can't be pushed into a corner and I don't want I have left of my life being controlled. I still want contact with my daughter of course I do, but I can't put my life on hold until she is of age where she will be doing her own thing as a young adult, I just don't know what to do I'm in such a state over this.
I also don't want to be seen as being selfish
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
She has told me that if I don't pick her up from school that she will stop me from seeing her, that was by text, I have a letter saying that she doesn't want me anywhere near her property, so how I deal with school holidays I've no idea. My daughter wanted to go home early one weekend but her mother told her that if she does she'll never see me or her grandparents again.
Now she says she taking me to court to force contact on her terms.

I give up.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
My daughter will be 10 in august
Your ex will have a shock
She cannot impose a contact arrangement only the court can do that - and the court will certainly take into account your work needs so your collecting her after work is likely to be what is ordered if an agreement cannot be reached.
Indeed even once the Order is made it cannot be used to force you to have the child is you do not wish to have her - it simply sets out when you CAN have her - and it certainly will not stop you emigrating in the future - although if you wish to preserve a relationship with your daughter you may have to apply to the Court to vary the Order so that YOU can enforce whatever contact is ordered
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Thankyou Clare.

You've no idea how much pressure that has lifted from me.
I wish you the best and once again thank you very much

Regs Gary
Hi Gary
You are most welcome - I hope all goes well
Clare and other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you