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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 35050
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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Hi the ex is now going ahead with contact order through the

Customer Question

Hi the ex is now going ahead with contact order through the courts for my 5 month old baby. However he is making false allegations and trying to get full custody. I agreed for him to meet the child in my presence or supervised access to which he doesn't agree with. He is threatening if I don't agree to his terms then that's the end of our marriage - currently we separated it's been 2 months. He is blackmailing me with things which are not relevant and emotionally abusing me. What actions can I take?
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 4 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Do you not wish the marriage to end?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
I don't want the marriage to end but he does.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
He has not gone for mediation or professional advice. It's just when things don't go according to him he leaves the house and now it's been 2 months apart he has threatening and blackmailing behaviour. Now tells me the marriage is over because I don't agree with him on seeing the child alone
Expert:  Clare replied 4 years ago.
I am afraid that there is nothing that you can do about his threats to divorce you
You are being completely reasonable about his contact with the child - but if he sees that as the end of the marriage then that is his decision
You have done everything you can to resolve the matter - all you can do now is allow the court to decide the issue
Please ask if you need further details
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
The allegations for the contact order are false, the ex says I am physical towards him and the child and also claims I have mental health issues. How does the court decide as the ex thinks he can say anything and the court will believe him? He assumes putting this forward the court would allow him full custody. Also once the hearing commences how soon does the ex get contact via contact centre.
Expert:  Clare replied 4 years ago.
He is wrong
The Court will look for evidence of his claims
Before the first hearing CAFCASS ( will contact the Police and Social Services to see what records they hold.
If there are none then this will make his allegations look unfounded
You can get a letter from your Doctor confirming that you do not have Mental Health issues and a letter from your health Visitor confirming they have no concerns about your care
In the absence of any evidence of his allegations he will find his application for Residence dismissed
Contact will start as soon as he agrees to it
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Thanks for your help with this.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Finally, to begin with how much contact is he likely to get and how often? And when can it be reviewed? Baby is only 5 month old and is afraid of him. When he is around she doesn't stop crying, and I am worried for her so will only allow supervised access.
Expert:  Clare replied 4 years ago.
the baby is unlikely to be frightened of HIM - just the anger and disruption and upset that he causes.
As a starting point an hour a week at a Contact Centre is a likely starting point - building up slowly from there