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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34885
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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I recently found out my husband has been having an affair for

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I recently found out my husband has been having an affair for at least 4 years and that he is planning to marry in April 15. Whenever I mention the future he becomes annoyed and will not discuss anything. We have had separate bedrooms for the past 15 months, he has not mentioned anything about the lady - he has visited her and taken holidays during these visits but myself and the children have not had a family holiday with him for 5 years, when I mention going away as a family he states work is too demanding (which it is sometimes). I have also found paperwork showing he has opened a joint account with another bank and have transferred money across from our bank account here.

We are abroad at the moment as my husband serves with the Armed Forces and due to move back to the UK in the coming months, my fear is that I will be left homeless (as I have found paperwork stating he is leaving the Armed Forces, although I'm not sure if he has sent them and therefore not entitled to housing) and as my daughter is starting her GCSE years this coming September I will be forced to stay in a new area where the school is without the support of friends. My son is off to University in October but I'm worried that the stress within the home will affect his studies.

If I remain in the current country as I have a sponsored job and the school our children attend is fee paying (currently paid for by the employer) and my husband returned to the UK alone and started divorce proceeding, what allowances would I be entitled to receive from my husband.
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
What assets and debts are there and what income do you each have?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

My husbands salary is approx. £38,000 pa and mine is approx. £11,000 pa. if I stay here working, if I return to the UK I will be unemployed. We don't own any property and have roughly £3,000 savings and debts of the same amount.


We have two cars in the UK worth a maximum of £9,000 and one over here worth about £9,000.


Hopefully this helps

How much income would you need in order to remain in Oman with the children?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

My daughters school fees are £10,185 (6555 OMR) per annum for years 10 and 11 rising to £11,933 (7680 OMR) per annum for years 12 and 13.


My son is completing his final year of sixth form and will be starting University in Sidcup, Kent this October. He is in the process of arranging student finances, although the University does not have residence therefore would be out in the local community costing between £100 - £150 per month for student accommodation.


Accommodation in Oman varies from £389 per month (250 OMR) whereby I would need transport to continue working as these are 25 miles (40 km) away or nearer work rent is upwards of £700 per month (450 OMR), these would still need transport but are much closer to work and school. These costs are based on a 2 bed apartment for myself and my daughter.


Purchasing a car and running costs per annum are approx. £2,553 (1,643 OMR) and food would cost approx. £2,300 (1,500 OMR).


I feel to continue living and working in Oman I would need roughly £19,500 (12,500) which is almost double which I currently earn.

What settlement will your husband receive if he leaves the army?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

When he leave I think the settlement is roughly £30,000, although not sure if this is a one off payment on top of his pension which will be approx. £12,000 pa.

how long has your husband been in the army and how long have you been married?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

He joined the Armed Forces at 16 in 1986 and is currently on a 5 years extension which finishes in 2016. We married in 1992, therefore married 22 years next month. We have been together for 25 years altogether.

What is he likely to be able to earn ?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

He's had a couple of interviews with recruitment agencies, the vacancies he discussed with them are around £25,000 per annum along with his pension gives a total earnings per year roughly as his Armed Forces salary.


I have seem paperwork suggesting he buys his girlfriends sister's share of the house they currently live in, although I'm not sure if this has progressed. This address is where he has some mail delivered to and I have seem an electoral role change of address for that address too.

In the event of a divorce the starting point for the division of the assets - including his leaving grant is 50/50 and it is unlikely that the court will stray far from this given that even the full amount would not allow you to purchase a property.
He will have to pay maintenance for your daughter of 12% of his GROSS income from all sources.
Your son can also seek financial assistance from him
You are also entitled to a pension Sharing Order which will reduce his pension income now - but ensure that you have a pension in the future
The only other entitlement you may have is for Spouse Maintenance
However if you could return to the UK and earn as much as your ex does then he would have a good argument for none being ordered an din any event it is unlikely to be more than a few hundred a month
Obviously this can only be the roughest of guides - so please ask if you need further details
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

If I am unable to continue working abroad due to financial reasons, would any of the information you have provided change?

No not at all
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