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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 35068
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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Hi I pay my wife a pre agreed maintanance by court order and

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Hi I pay my wife a pre agreed maintanance by court order and have access to my children every other weekend. Circumstances have changed personally and I really would like to get further access if not shared custody of my children. My ex will not have any of this as she is concerned that maintaiance would stop.. There is no thought for what's best for our children as I know they want to see me more... I gave no idea where to turn and really want to see my babies more and be a bigger part of thief lived and upbringing. Thanks in advance
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
How old are the children and what further contact are you looking for?
How long is your current weekend contact?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hi Clare my children are 14 9 and 7 and I would like to amend the court order for shared custody..... The children want to spend more quality time together, my weekend contact is Friday to Sunday evening every other weekend. I do get to see them sometimes on a week night but not for long... My children have asked to spend more time with me but my ex will not discuss ....

Do you live close enough to the schools to be able to have them on a school night
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Yes we live in the same village in fact I'm a lot closer to the school they go too

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I just want to see my children more I have a bigger house they have a better space to play with their own rooms and be able to be their for them , however my ex wife will not even have a discussion about it.. can you not put some advise of how to change a court order or where i go I'm not stopping maintenance payments as this will only impact on the children. The maintenance is funding my ex wife life style but font know where to turn other than courts and i want to engage and discuss amicable.... This is not happening happy yo try mediation or any other service but not allot I can do if she will not discuss....

The starting point is to try and discuss matters with your ex using Family mediation ( so that you can explore changing the current contact arrangements
It would be wise to chose a mediator trained to work with children so that their views can be brought to the table
I would suggest that you ask to extend the alternate weekends to Monday morning at school and ask for one night a week and half the school holidays.
Whilst this might reduce the child maintenance it will not exclude it completely
If she will not discuss matters then you may have to consider applying to the court for a Child Arrangement Order
You can read more on these websites
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details
Clare and other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you