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familylawexpert, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 311
Experience:  Substantial experience (14yrs +) in divorce, financial cases, cohabitation, pre-nuptial agreements and civil partnerships.
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Hello. My name is*****m 33yrs old and have told

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Hello. My name is***** 33yrs old and have told my husband a couple of weeks ago that I would like us to split up.

We have been married for 10 years and have a 2 & half year old girl.

I want to stay in the house we have with our child and have shared custody. My husband (Richard) said he was ok with this. Unfortunately, he is now saying that he doesn't have to leave the house and he is wanting to go for full custody. I work as a staff nurse and therefore do shift work. My husband says that because of this, he will have more rights than me over custody of our child.

I have already spoke to a solicitor last week but she is not available today with it being a Saturday.

Please can someone let me know if my work will affect the care of our child and who she lives with. Tithe mortgage is joint but I have said that I will take over paying for the full monthly payment if/when he leaves.

As with any break up, things are becoming difficult.

Please can I have some advice?

Many thanks,

Lucy Alderson

My name is Mac. I can help you with your question.

I will talk in terms of what a court might do regarding your child, but only as it is the backstop for what would happen if you two cannot reach an agreement. Going to Court is the last thing you should aim for in relation to childcare, as it takes ages, is very expensive, and is extremely destructive for the ongoing relationship that the two of you will have to have as parents.

The Court will look at what is in your child's best interests, in particular at what is practical given your respective working (and other) arrangements, and how the care of your child has been managed in the past.

Although the Courts have historically tended to favour mother's with more of the responsibilty for (or at least time with) the child, that is changing and fathers these days have a much greater chance of achieving something close to a broad sharing of the care and responsibility.

What exactly would happen in your case would depend upon just what your shift work would allow. You need to think about what proposed structure you would like to see in place. I would recommend that the two of you then consider using a mediator to help you discuss future arrangements. Obviously those arrangements will not include you living together in the future, although neither of you can force the other out before the end of the divorce (in the absence of domestic violence).

I hope that is helpful.
familylawexpert and 2 other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
If, for example, I met someone else, would this go against me? Thanks.
No, it would not.