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Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34895
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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my ex wife left me for another man 10 mo9nths ago. We agreed

Customer Question

my ex wife left me for another man 10 mo9nths ago. We agreed for 50% shared custody and to wait to introduce partners to our 6 years old daughter until 1 year of separation.
Last weekend while i was away from the coutry my daughter told me on the phone they were going to meet mamma new boyfriend. I got upset of course and now my ex want to take me to a mediator. What shall i expect and what are my options?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
What is your concern about what has happened - and what do you wish to achieve
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Hi Clare

basically I would like my ex to respect my decision. If I raised my concern about introducing a new partner to my daughter was because of advised I received from a psychologist and from what I read on the internet. Unfortunately I feel this set a precedent of lack of respect and I want to make sure future decision are followed. Just to make things clear I too have a new partner but we both decided to wait at least 1 year to introduce her to my daughter.

Another concern I have with my ex is her binge drinking which I feel can be endangering my daughter safety when with her.

The answer I've received from my wife are downright ridiculous. She said I was shouting on the phone,which i think is a more than understandable reaction since i was in another country and unable to do anything and she also told me her parents told her would be ok to introduce her new partner without my approval. For the record she is 40 years old and I'm 43...

To sum up if I go to mediation I like to have a good argument to make sure this kind of thing do not happen any more.



Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
It would certainly be sensible to go to mediation and agree a Parenting Plan that you both sign dealing with such issues.
I would say that a year was an overlong period to decide on - six months would have been reasonable - but you are entitled to be upset that she did not inform you of her intentions beforehand so that you were prepared
However shouting on the phone, whilst understandable, is not helpful and in that respect a Mediator and a signed Parenting Plan are sensible ways forward.
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