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Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 35051
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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, I have been separated from my wife two beautiful

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I have been separated from my wife two beautiful girls months now after she left me . Whilst it has been very heart breaking and tough , I now know that we are never going to get back together as to her choice , I still really want to be a part of our beautiful girls lives .
The problems I'm now facing when I have asked to see my beautiful girls is that my wife is saying that my beautiful girls are saying to her that they don't want to see me and its their choice ... My daughters are aged 11 1/2 and 9 1/2 . My eldest daughter has told my wife that she does want to see me but has now said to her that she doesn't want to come on her own after my youngest daughter has said she doesn't want to see me .
My questions to you are , Is this right wife to stop me from seeing my beautiful girls by saying this in this way ? And how can I obtain access to seeing my beautiful girls as I really don't want to give them up or lose them forever .
I am lost and hurt , I really don't know which way to turn or how I can ask . Please can you advise me , I would really appreciate it so very much .
Thank You .

Thank you question.

I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
What pattern of contact have you had with the children in the last 16 months
Customer: replied 3 years ago.


I have had no pattern of contact with my beautiful girls .

The only time I have seen them is when it has suited my wife , be it at a weekend on a Saturday or a Sunday and only when she has been there . I have not seen them on my own and within the last 16 months I have only seen them approximately 10 times .

The times I have spent with them has always only ever been short and on their terms , i.e. at a cinema to watch a film or at a pub/restaurant meal on my birthday/fathers day and Christmas . The times I have spent with them has always been very special to me . I love them both very much and I have told them that if ever they wanted to speak to me or see me then they only had to ask their mother and we would sort it .

I have told my wife this arrangement and to this date whenever I have asked her , she has told me that the reason she hasn't contacted me about this is because they haven't asked her to call me . This hurts me immensely and she knows that only to well . Her response to this has become " There's no point in getting worked up about it . Just take it as it comes " .

I am now very lost in all this mess and don't know how I can resolve it . I don't want my beautiful girls to think I don't love them or want anything to do with them anymore .

The law says that children are entitled to spend time with both parents and the Courts will enforce this if necessary.
You starting point is to try and discuss this with your ex using Family Mediation
It would be sensible to choose a mediator trained to work with young people so that someone independent can speak to the children about their wishes
Should that prove unsuccessful then you will need to apply to the courts Child Arrangement Order setting out the time that you spend with the girls
The children are on the young side wishes to be seen as decisive - especially when they are in no doubt of what their mother wishes them to say.
Please ask if you need further details
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Clare ,

Thank you very much help and advice in giving me a direction to head down a path to try to save my relationship with my beautiful girls . I hope all will work out well to bring a satisfactory end to this family dispute .

Much appreciated .

Kind Regards ,


You are welcome - I hope all goes well
Clare and other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you