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James Mather
James Mather,
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1390
Experience:  Senior Partner at Berkson Wallace
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My wife told me 6 weeks ago she wanted to separate and

Customer Question

My wife told me 6 weeks ago she wanted to separate and she has been having an affair with a work colleague for 3 months. We have 2 girls 7 and 5. We have been together 10 years and there has never been any unreasonable behaviour on my part. We both work and she has shared the family costs of mortgage, schooling, bills etc.
She is now presenting me with divorce papers to divorce me quoting fickle reasons like 'I snore' and I made her return to work after the birth of no 2.
The question is this seems aggressive and what is she trying to achieve here? She has already put a deposit down on a rental with her new man and we have agreed to share the children 50/50 and meet all the bills going forward. I just don't understand why she is divorcing me when we agreed to have a separation papers done with the divorce a fait accompli further down the tracks.
I don't want her back in my life as the marriage has been loveless for a while. I also want to do this as peacefully as possible for the childrens sake. Surely a separation agreement will suffice for the interim?
I do not want to sell the house quite yet as it is the family home and the girls are settled there. It is also the cheapest option for me to live. Will her divorcing me force a house sale? She says that it won't if it is not included in the consent form. She works for the law society and her affair is with a lawyer so I feel all a bit exposed!
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Has she included a claim for costs?
How much is the house worth and how much is outstanding on the mortgage?
What other assets are there and what income do you each have?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.


Thank you for getting back to me. My wife is paying for the divorce costs. We are splitting the costs of the mortgage, school fees and general childrens costs (clothes/birthdays/after school nanny) as per usual.

House is worth approx. £700K, £270K mortgage on it.

No other assets. She earns 85K I earn 60K. She is due to take receipt of money from her French family from an estate but this is strictly controlled by French law and probably can't leave France. approx. 250K.

Does this help?

Thanks you.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Are you sure those funds can't leave France?
How much does a cheaper three bedroom property in the same school area cost to buy?