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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34908
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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Me and my partner split up over one year ago. We have two

Customer Question

Me and my partner split up over one year ago. We have two children together. Whilst we don't communicate perfectly, we did come to an arrangement. I, as the father, get alternative weekends (The children go home early on Sunday) and every Wednesday. Initially,
the mum would ring every night they are with me. The issue that came from that was it would upset our daughter every time and she would want to go home. To try and alleviate the stress of that, I stated that it was maybe best she didn’t ring on the Wednesday
and on the alternative weekends, she only rings on the Saturday and not the Friday. This seems to work wonders and now she copes much better when the mum rings. We are at a stage now that the mum wants to ring each night they are with me. She has stated she
will bring this to court so there is a court order that will mean I can’t deny her access. Would the court action something like that? As a father, I feel like when the kids are in my care, they are my responsibility. I should be the one deciding what’s best
for them and not being dictated by someone else’s decision. I understand courts prefer mutual decisions these days but there have been actions in the past that make me feel I should be responsible when they are with me. In a nutshell, can the court enforce
that when the kids are with me, they have to contact her or that she can state/decide what they should/shouldn't do.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
My name is ***** ***** I shall do my best to help you but I need some further information first
Do you phone the children every night when they are at home?
How old are the children?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

When they are at their mothers (home) I ring them every second night.

The children are 4 and 6 (nearly 7)

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Can I just check - you ARE named on the birth certificates?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

Yes, that is correct.

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Then you have Parental Responsibility for the children and the right to make all necessary decisions about their care whilst they are with you
No court would enforce a nightly phone call whilst they are with you - anymore than they would order a nightly phone call from you.
You have made a reasonable compromise and have little to fear from the court.
The way forward is to discuss matters with your ex using Family mediation
to agree a Parenting Plan
I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details