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ukfamilysolicitor, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1368
Experience:  Divorce, Finances, Children, Domestic Violence, Care Proceedings
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Long story but found out 3yrs ago my husband was in substantial amount of debt. Since

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Hi, Long story but found out 3yrs ago my husband was in substantial amount of debt. Since then my family and I have bailed him out. About 1yr ago it transpires he's got himself into a significant amount more debt. I've tried to communicate with him several times to understand, but he continually turns the situation around me being fairly verbally abusive. We have 2 children aged 5 and 2. He is a good dad, but since I found out about the debt we have lived totally separate lives and everytime I try and set goals for us he always never manages to meet them. I have asked him to leave our family home but he refuses to go. I need a break from this emotionally draining situation but won't leave the children. I work full time in a good job so have the means to move out. But, can I just take children and put the family home up for sale without having to talk to him? As every time we talk I end up being insulted and further hurt.
Thank you!
Thank you for your question. I am sorry to hear about the difficulties that you are experiencing with your husband.
In relation to the verbal abuse you have detailed - you should consider contacting an independent domestic violence service for support such as The support offered can be wide ranging.
If matters escalate, or you feel unsafe - you should contact the Police for assistance. Consideration could also be given to applying to the court for a non molestation order to prevent unwanted behaviour.
Consideration should be given by you to making a referral to a family mediation service such as the National Family Mediation Service As they may be able to assist yourself and your husband agree arrangements in relation to both your children and your property.
If you left your home with your children, your husband could issue an application at court for disclosure of the children's whereabouts and / or a prohibited steps order. If you consider that your children will be safe when spending time with your husband then you could seek to agree a schedule as to the time that they spend with their father.
In relation to the family home, on a long term basis, it would be unwise to seek to sell the same without agreement being reached as to the division. Negotiations as to such division should take place after full disclosure by both yourself and your husband. Division should take place only obtaining a court order or after a court has sealed a consent order. Division without such steps could lead to the possibility of a future claim. A court can only approve such orders during the course of divorce or judicial separation proceedings.
On a short term basis, if agreement can not be reached as to who will remain in the property then an application could be made to the court for an occupation order.
If the matrimonial home is in your husbands sole name then you should obtain a Matrimonial Homes Rights Notice. This can be registered free of charge by the Land Registry.
I hope this is of assistance. Please do not hesitate to contact me if I can assist any further.
I would be grateful if you could rate my answer.
Kind Regards
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