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ukfamilysolicitor, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1382
Experience:  Divorce, Finances, Children, Domestic Violence, Care Proceedings
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Been with partner years 2 children joint mortgage he

Customer Question

been with partner for 26 years 2 children joint mortgage he has been stashing his wages for last couple of years letting me pay everything I want out causing me mental abuse half doing things in house leaving it a mess so I cant sell it haven't spoken for 6 month making me feel unconfitable so I leave saying everything is his just about to sell boat brought 4 years ago for 15k so he can stash that money away feel like giving up where do I stand

Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
I am very sorry to hear about the difficulties that you are experiencing with your partner. I am a family solicitor and I can help.
In relation to the mental abuse you have detailed - you should consider contacting an independent domestic violence service for support such as The support offered can be wide ranging.
If matters escalate, or you feel unsafe - you should contact the Police for assistance. Consideration could also be given to applying to the court for a non molestation order to prevent unwanted behaviour.
Consideration should be given by you to making a referral to a family mediation service such as the National Family Mediation Service As they may be able to assist yourself and your partner agree arrangements in relation to both your children and your property.
In relation to the family home, on a long term basis as you are unmarried, if an agreement cannot be reached as to the property and division then an application would need to be made to the court under the Trust of Land Act. If you are Joint Tenants the presumption is normally a 50/50 division however it could be argued for different shares if one party has added value to the property.
On a short term basis, if agreement can not be reached as to who will remain in the property then an application could be made to the court for an occupation order.
I hope this is of assistance. Please do not hesitate to contact me if I can assist any further.
Kindest Regards
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
I would've grateful for positive feedback
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

He has now bugged the house told the kids not to tell me but they did nos everything I am doing and saying who is comming and going and lets them no can I get the police to do something about this as dont want to get involved in domestic matters surley this is against the law

Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
I am sorry to hear this.
You could try the police although they may say it is a civil matter - I am not sure as it is out of my remit of expertise. You should still consider calling them especially if you find anything suspicious.
The Data Protection Act makes it an offence ‘to knowingly or recklessly obtain, disclose or procure the disclosure of personal information without the consent of the data controller.’ However the punishment for offences is no more than a fine.
The police may consider that he is harassing you. They could issue a harassment act warning. You could also consider a non molestation order.
I would also be concerned about the emotional harm being caused to your children by your ex saying things like these to them.
Kind Regards