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Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 34906
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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There. I have been separated from my daughter's father since 2011. We have a �

Customer Question

Hi there. I have been separated from my daughter's father since 2011. We have a 'schedule' whereby he sees her every Wednesday night and every 2nd Friday and Saturday. We also try to allocated time so that he spends time with her for 1/2 the holidays. We both work full time and have demanding family and work responsibilities and I share the schedule way ahead of time to plan work trips etc. He is starting a new job on 26 October, and has not communicated with his employer that he has family commitments on certain days. I have communicated the schedule for the rest of the year but he is not willing to have her on his 'usual' days as he will be on probation for 3 months and says he needs to assess how flexible they are with flexi hours before he commits to his usual time with her. This has a knock-on affect on my work commitments as I have international travel etc. which has been scheduled to accommodate my family commitments during the same time. The arrangement we have was neve
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
How can I help with this please?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.

The arrangements were made between the two of us and never taken to court. The agreed schedule has been followed since our separation (almost 4 years) with some flexibility when needed from both sides. I'm finding myself in a very difficult situation because of his new job, he is not able to continue our arrangement and with his decision to see "how it will work out for him" before discussing any further arrangements with regards ***** ***** daughter. My current work and travel commitments are being challenged as it has been arranged based on what has always been agreed and followed. He is not flexible on this, did not ask whether we can work this through and has basically said that he can't commit to anything before he understands the ways of his new work environment - which may also mean he may not even see his daughter during the week. Can he do this? I would like to know whether you can give me any advice on how to handle this please?

Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Thank you for that
How old is the child?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
She will be six later this month.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
Does your ex pay child maintenance?
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
It is calculated through the Child Benefit office (UK) and then he pays me directly.
Expert:  Clare replied 2 years ago.
I am afraid that the news is not good.
You and your ex need to try and discuss matters again using Family mediation
However if you cannot reach an agreement I am afraid that there is no basis on which your ex can be forced to have the child more often than he wishes to - it is a major flaw in the system
The only protection of any sort that you have is that if he does not have the child as many nights as in the past then his Maintenance payments will go up - but I appreciate that that is of relatively little help to you
I am so sorry not to have better news
Please ask if you need further details