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ukfamilysolicitor, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1381
Experience:  Divorce, Finances, Children, Domestic Violence, Care Proceedings
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My wife left me a year ago else. Over the first

Customer Question

My wife left me a year ago for someone else. Over the first three months our children stayed with me for a week then with the mother for a week. I was bullied into a corner mentally and financially with nobody to turn to, almost to the point of loosing everything. I lost the children to the mother and have only been able to see my children every other weekend. I managed to keep the 3 bed house going for sake of having the children overnight on the weekend I see them and their school is 2 minutes walk away. My little girl is nearly 4 and two boys aged 6 + 10. I have also a new partner who lives with me who is a school teacher and the children adore. My children miss me dearly to a point sometimes of tears when they have to go and want more time with me.
12 mths on and the divorce papers have arrived and the grounds are all lies. Until I sign, which I will not do, I am starting to get bullied mentally and financially where the children are concerned. The parental responsibility to the mother was not awarded through court just taken from me. I have never missed a maintenance payment to the children but I am being threatened of more money in the way of the mother asking for my girlfriends date of birth and N.I number. This is because I haven't signed the papers. I need to put a stop to all this now but don't know how to go about it. The children and I need more time with each other. What can I do. Kind regards. Ben.
Submitted: 2 years ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
Hello Ben
Welcome to Just Answer
I am a Solicitor and will assist you.
If you are being denied spending time with your children then you should consider making an application to the court for a Child Arrangement Order.
The courts do consider that children should have a good relationship with both of their parents and if is practicable and in the children's best interests then the courts will consider making orders which reflect equal shared care.
Before you can make an application to the court - you need to refer the matter to mediation. Mediation will help you both try and agree a schedule in relation to whom the children spend time with - without the need to make an application to the court. There are lots of mediation services and there will be one local to you. One such national service is
If your ex wont engage in mediation or your cant agree - then you should make an application to the court. Form C100. To Local Family Court. Court fee is £215.
If you want to contest the divorce petition then there are strict timescales within which to do so.
You need to fill in the acknowledgment of service form and return it within 8 days of being receiving the same.
You need to complete the section that says you are defending the divorce.
The court will send copies to your spouse.
When you have returned the form - you have up to 21 days to say why you are defending the divorce. This is called giving an answer.
To do this, fill in the answer to a divorce petition. There is a £245 court fee.
If you wanted file for divorce yourself - you could - although I note that you state you don't want to be divorced.
The court will list the case for a hearing.
Contested divorced can be expensive and you should consider instructing legal representation for a contested hearing.
If you dont respond to the divorce petition - then it is likely that your ex will seek to have you personally served with the divorce papers. Your ex may also seek the costs of this personal service are paid by you. If you still don't respond then your wife can continue with the divorce proceedings without your consent being required.
Kind Regards
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Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 2 years ago.
please kindly remember to rate positively - your question will not close and I can answer your follow up questions for free