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ukfamilysolicitor, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1437
Experience:  Divorce, Finances, Children, Domestic Violence, Care Proceedings
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My husband and I have been together 23 years (20 years

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Hi ,
My husband and I have been together 23 years (20 years married), and are now separating. We are trying to reach an amicable settlement.
My husband takes home £3400 per month (after tax, NI, childcare and pension contribution) and I take home £1600 after tax and NI.
Our house is worth £480k and will have to be sold. This will raise equity of £340k after the mortgage is repaid. We also have £30k savings and I have a £10k car asset.
The proposal on the table is that everything is split 50/50. In summary:-
House £170k each
Savings £20k husband, £10k plus car myself.
Pension CETV value split 50/50
In addition, based on government and CM websites, he is prepared to pay circa £600-£700 per month to support our two children aged 10 and 13. I believe I would also be entitled to some benefits totaling £200 per month which I’m not claiming at the moment.
This would leave me and the children with circa £2500 per month and my husband circa £2700 per month.
Neither of us can afford the time or expense of mediation or solicitors, other than to draw up the agreement once reached.
Can you advise on whether you believe this is a fair settlement? We have no other debts or assets, and he has agreed that I can take the pick of the household possessions to make a new home for the children.
Fiona Boulton.
Good Morning
Welcome to Just Answer
I am a Solicitor and will assist you.
It sounds to me as though matters are very amicable between you.
You have detailed a settlement that is close to a 50/50 share although you are getting slightly less as your husband is keeping his savings and you are having the car.
As you earn less than your husband and will also be taking on the main care of your children - then you could actually argue a larger share - somewhere around 10 - 20%. You could also ask for spousal maintenance on an on-going basis as your husbands earning capacity is greater than yours.
You could therefore ask for more than you are getting if you wanted too.
That being said - I can see your logic in the way that you have worked through the agreement. I can see that you have tried to be fair. You have to balance asking for more against the costs of litigating the matter at court.
Sorry pressed answer to early ... Continuing
Perhaps you could agree a peppercorn maintenance provision for you. You could then review the position and if this should be increased once the child maintenance and your benefits stopped.
Otherwise as you have previously stated it is very important that you have a consent order drawn up by a Solicitor.
Kind Regards
Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Thanks Caroline. The car is worth £10k so it is a 50/50 split, and I will also be getting a greater share of the household assets. We both want the equity in the house for a deposit, and I feel that we would be in danger of spending £10k plus on solicitors fee (and he will fight me if he needs to) just to gain a similar amount. He is less concerned about the pension pot as he will inherit £120k in the next 5 years. He is a completely fair person, and he has filed the divorce on grounds of my triple adultery over the last 6 years. If solicitors get involved, then this will also count against me?
Sorry for my delay in responding to you.
My apologies - I had read the sentence in respect of savings incorrectly. I note that you are splitting this.
In reality - fully contested proceedings can cost circa £15k.
Please do note that behaviour will not affect a financial settlement even if this is adultery.
Kind Regards
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Customer: replied 2 years ago.
Please can you tell me what costs will be incurred if I do not sign notice of proceedings for divorce Form D10. My husband has not finalised his decision now and sent this before thinking that it may be possible to save our marriage. In don't want to sign it for sentimental reasons if I don't have to and he drops the petition but it does say "delay in returning the form may add to the costs".
Please could you advise.Thank you
Thank you for your post.
My apologies for my delay in responding to you - I live in the area which has had power cut since Saturday.
If you choose not to complete the D10 - then your husband could seek to have you personally served with the court papers and then seek that the court order that you are responsible for such costs. This would likely be in the region of £200 including the process server fee and legal fees.
Kind Regards