My apologies for my delay in responding to you today. I think that the site may have changed some its settings as I couldnt access the chat on my iphone so I had to wait to get home so I can access the chat from my laptop.
Ignore the phone calls - I think that they are automatic pop ups.
To answer your questions - If you can agree matters amongst yourselves then you dont have to use mediation. It is advisable that you do get what has been agreed drawn up into a consent order and sealed by the court before division - as this will prevent any future claims being made. This is the best way to create finality in respect of the matrimonial finances but it is only possible to have a consent order of this type approved if your go through divorce proceedings.
You can consider a separation agreement if you decide not to divorce yet. This will record what has been agreed but is not technically binding on a future family court Judge said a claim be made in respect of the matrimonial finances in the future. That being said - Judges are ordering in line with what had been previously agreed - if full disclosure took place and the Judge considers it is fair.
Separating means you live apart but you cannot remarry unless you divorce.
Divorce and financially proceedings are separate proceedings - but they are intrinsically linked. You can divorce on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour (known as a quickie divorce) and this can normally be finalised in about 3 months if both parties agree. If the finances can be agreed that you really should get a solicitor to draw up a consent order confirming the position and this be submitted to the court for its approval when applying for decree absolute so the finances are resolved as well. If the finances cant be agreed - then separate proceedings can be issued for the court to resolve - this can result in the divorce being delayed until the finances are resolved.
In respect of your daughter - it is the view fo the court that children are entitled to a god relationship wit both of their parents as long as there are no child protection concerns. Shared care arrangements are becoming increasingly common if this meets the needs of the child. If you can reach agreement - then you do not need a court order. As the court will only make an order if it is necessary to do so.
A family court Judge wont be bound by a Deed of Trust - although they would consider what was agreed - they could order otherwise if they felt it was unfair.
If respect of the matrimonial finances - everything is included - yours and your husbands.
Please do not hesitate to ask if I can assist your further.