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Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 2851
Experience:  Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
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I am a dad (through marriage). My wife does not live with me.

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I am a dad (through marriage). My wife does not live with me. The children live with her. She has stopped allowing me to see the children and the phone contact allowed is quite poor. The antecedent is that my wife insists that I need to do paternity test before 'and other things will follow'. THIS IS DESPITE THE FACT THAT I HAVE NEVER DENIED THE PATERNITY.
1.) Does she have the right to do this?
2.) Can paternity test be imposed on me if I do not dispute that I am the father
3.) What can be the next line of action, please?
Hi, thank you for your question. Just a bit more information required to fully assist you:-How old are the children?-When did she first raise the issue of paternity with you?-How long have you been separated?-What have the arrangements been for contact since separation?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thanks. 7+ (that is 7, running to 8) (twins)A couple of years back, then stopped insisting, seems to be insisting for almost a year nowWe have not been living together for over 4 years. That is 4 years running to 5Initially, it was mutual and verbal agreement that it should be as my work permits
Thank you for confirming. Are you named on the birth certificate as the father?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Of course, yes. (Sorry I had to go away urgently before, only to discover that I can not return on time. I am so sorry.)
No worries. The issue of paternity is a bit late for her to bring up now, as well as intermittently raising it as an issue throughout the years! As you are named on the birth certificates then a court will agree you have parental responsibility and she will need to show cause that she has doubts that you are the father - the court will find her actions unreasonable as it has been 7 years since she should have really dealt with this!In the circumstances I would suggest that you make a referral to an independent mediator (you can find local ones here: The mediator will assist you both in reaching an amicable agreement that is in the children's best interests. If mediation does not help, then you will be able to pursue an application to court under Form C100 together with a £215 court fee to your local family court for a child arrangement order and the court can make a decision regarding the matter.If you found this information helpful please provide a positive rating. I will not be credited for answering your question without a positive rating. Thank you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thanks for your response. Please, going by your response, when is the issue of raising such paternity test request becomes late, or a bit late for the mother? Thanks. Also, one of my original questions is that does she have the right to stop me from seeing or contacting the children in this / these circumstances the circumstance of me not doing the paternity test?If after seeing the mediator and there is a need to go to court, will that be about this / these current issues only, if unresolved? That is meaning that if another unresolved issue comes up later, after this is resolved in / out of court, I have to go to the mediator again, first before going to court, meaning that EACH NEW ISSUE WILL HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE MEDIATOR BEFORE I CAN GO TO COURT? Thanks!
Given the clear history of your relationship with the children, it will be difficult for her to argue to stop your contact and she will only have cause to do so if there are concerns of your level of care or if there are child protection concerns. Even if you did paternity test and it states you are not the father, you have grounds to pursue maintaining contact if you so wish.The issue of paternity is something that should be raised almost immediately if it is an issue - 7 years down is a bit late for her to start querying, but a court could possibly be persuaded that it is necessary and in the interests of the children if she can provide grounds as to why she thinks you are not the father.In relation to mediation and other issues, it is difficult to give broad information about this as it would depend on what the issue is at the time and what has happened to any existing proceedings - but in general, if matters settle at court and other matters arise later, the court would want to see that you have attempted to settle issues without having to go to court, so you would likely need to consider mediation again in the future.If you found this information helpful please provide a positive rating. I will not be credited for answering your question without a positive rating. Thank you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Basically, what she has said is that she thinks I PERSONALLY doubt the paternity and (also) accuses that the level of care I contribute is poor, saying that this is the premise on which she bases her assertion that I doubt the paternity. There are texts and at least one e-mail in which I requested to see the children (on different occasions) and she turned them down. In terms of financial support, I am paying child support and never defaulted. She has said that she had been to Mediation before, but I can not remember having any contact from any mediator. For instance, my wife claims she no longer has my address (could not give it to the Mediator), even though I have texted it to her before and she used it to successfully navigate her way to the address. As for protection, I have a clean CRB (DBS) consistently. The current one is less than 6 months old. DESPITE THIS, SHE HAS NOT ALLOWED ME TO SEE THE CHILDREN FOR 1 YEAR, RUNNING TO 2.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Also, BEFORE SHE STOPPED ALLOWING ME TO SEE THEM, she said she wants me to have them for specific 2 nights per week, which my work does not allow, as I have not succeeded in getting flexible working support for: I work in the hospital and do shifting.
Thank you. I would highly suggest you attend mediation initially yourself to see if it is suitable, and if it is deemed not to be to pursue an application to court.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thanks. Will whatever is determined by the mediator be binding, or not until it is accepted and embraced (yielded to)?
In relation to child arrangements it will only be enforceable if it is a court order. So if an agreement is made in mediation you should apply to court to have it turned into an order.
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Do you mean that anyone of the parents can apply to court, even if the other is not willing / interested in going that far?
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Many thanks for your reply. I am quite satisfied. Your patience, particularly is laudable. Please, where do I rate you?
No worries, glad to have been able to help. You should be offered an opportunity to rate now
Harris and other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Thanks. You are a five star personality. That is what I will give. Thanks!
Customer: replied 1 year ago.
Still waiting for the opportunity to rate, please. Thanks.