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Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 2851
Experience:  Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
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My ex partner works a 4 nights on 4 nights off rotation at

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My ex partner works a 4 nights on 4 nights off rotation at work. We split over 6 months ago and his contact with our 2 children has been as and when. Since my new partner came on the scene my ex has now decided he wants the girls to stay him the 4 nights he is off I'm not happy with this as it means completely disrupting their routines and he would end up seeing them and being with them more that I will...... I'm going to seek legal advice but I'm wondering whether this would go in his favour? I've offered 3.5 days a week after originally offering 1 or 2 overnights per week and 1 or 2 pick ups and tea time etc depending on how many overnights were done that week He's refusing any suggestion saying 4 nights is the only way to be fair to him ..... Please help

Hi, thank you for your question. Just a bit more information required to fully assist you:

-How old are the children?

-Are the current arrangements in a court order, or only between yourselves?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
They are 7 and 2And the arrangements are just between ourselves

What have the arrangements been to date?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
To date there's been nothing set, he has had them once or twice a week overnight and maybe once or twice for tea after school, I've been really flexible around when he's been able to 'fit them in' around his shifts and his social life - there hasn't been anything regular since we split in February

Thanks for confirming. Firstly, the contact arrangements should be considered inline with what is in the children's best interests and not what is "fair" for him. You have outlined that his proposal will be disruptive to their routine and you have offered a compromise and an increase to proposals which appear to be reasonable.

In the circumstances I would suggest you again put the proposals to him in writing and explain what the children's routines are and how his proposals will impact them.

If no agreement can be reached directly between you I would suggest that you make a referral to an independent mediator (you can find local ones here: The mediator will assist you both in reaching an amicable agreement that is in the children's best interests. If mediation does not help, then either of you will be able to pursue an application to court under Form C100 together with a £215 court fee to your local family court for a child arrangement order and the court can make a decision regarding the matter. For your information the Court will take into consideration the following when making a decision regarding the application:

1.The wishes and feelings of the child concerned
2. The child’s physical, emotional and educational needs
3. The likely effect on the child if circumstances changed as a result of the courts decision
4. The child’s age, sex, backgrounds and any other characteristics which will be relevant to the court’s decision
5. Any harm the child has suffered or may be at risk of suffering
6. Capability of the child’s parents (or any other person the courts find relevant) at meeting the child’s needs
7. The powers available to the court in the given proceedings

If you have any further questions regarding this please let me know. In the meantime if you found this information helpful please provide a positive rating using the stars at the top of this page. I will not be credited for answering your question without a positive rating. Thank you

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