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Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 2851
Experience:  Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
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My daughter doesn't want to go back to her father tomorrow.

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My daughter doesn't want to go back to her father tomorrow. She is a very unhappy/distressed little girl & doesn't want to be living with him (out of 14 days, I have her for 6, him 8 days) I've been to the doctors & have spoken with my solicitor this past weeks. He keeps referring back to a court order made in April. It does state at the end, times can be altered/changed, to be agreed by both parties. My ex husband to be will not listen to his daughter asking to spend more time with me. She's missed out on Birthdays because he's said no. My daughter is having nightmares about her father shouting at her, she gets sent to her room for getting angry & frustrated with him. She shouted & stamped her feet to get him to listen to her, but continued to watch the tv. She's become very clingy. He had mouths me to her.......
I have tried to discuss the situation over the past couple of days with him. But I am being ignored. I rang to speak with my solicitor yesterday afternoon, but it was her day off & nobody else was available to ask- where would I stand legally if my daughter refused to go with him tomorrow morning (I managed to get it arranged over the summer hols, alternate weeks, cross over being 10am Sunday morning) my daughter is getting very anxious. I would really appreciate some advice. Thank you

Hi, thanks for your question. Just a bit more information required to fully assist you;

-Are you all in England or Wales?

-How old is she?

-Can you attach a copy of the court order using the paperclip icon please?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I live in Dorset England. My daughter is 7 yes old.
July last year I had a break down. My 16 yr old son (at the time) was being mentally abused by my ex husband to be. I was working every hour I could, running the home, with not help whatsoever. My ex did nothing to help. I took an overdose Jan 2015 & again in June. I had absolutely had enough & couldn't cope with everything, it was a cry for help. I felt I was on a mountain screaming for help & not getting it. I drank at times to block things out (never every day. Once every 6-8wks, where I'd go pop, as it were) My ex is extremely manipulative. My solicitor finds him a very difficult nan to deal with. I got told that his own solicitor struggles with him. Social services as of April 2016 are no longer a part of our lives, they're happy that I've done my counselling, attended everything I been asked to attend, I've been a new relationship since last October, a lovely man, who is totally different to my ex. I'm working fulltime-set my own business up again. So I'm not in the bad place I was last year. My ex broke me!! He's not changed at all, just moved onto being abusive?? Shouting, not listening to our daughter. Her clothes are too sml/filthy. His parents cook & do all their washing for them.
My daughter doesn't need & I don't want her to go through what my son endured.
Thank you, ***** ***** attached the April court order

Thanks for confirming and providing the order. The news is not great. As you have a final order in place, you must abide by it despite what your daughter is stating given that she is only 7 years old. You must continue to promote the arrangements and, given the issues you are raising, you should consider applying to court to vary the order using form C100 and a £215 court fee to your local family court.

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