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Harris, Family Law Expert
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 2851
Experience:  Family Law - Specialist in Divorce, Financial Relief and Children Matters
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My husband left me a few weeks ago and I got very ill after

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my husband left me a few weeks ago and I got very ill after because he was threatening to break in my home. I lost my job as a result and he stopped all the bills he was paying too. Called the police and they got a restraining order on him and wanted him to be prosecuted because he's beaten me in the past and been cautioned for it. I've since found out he was having an affair with a girl he'd told me trained with him at a park. He has said only two weeks ago he loves me and misses me but he has financially crippled me. Can you advise me on how to get spousal maintenance.

Hi, thank you for your question. Just a bit more information required to fully assist you:
-How old are you both?
-How long have you been married?
-Do you have any children together, if so their ages and proposed arrangements?
-What is the value of the property, and what is the outstanding mortgage?
-Who is now living in the property?
-Whose name is ***** ***** in?
-What other assets and pensions do you both have (both sole and joint), together with values?
-What are your respective incomes?

Customer: replied 1 year ago.
I'm 37 and he is 32 years old.
Married for 4.5years together for 9 years.
No children, two dogs.
The property is in my name only as I bought it before I met him. Approximately 190,000 left on it.
I'm living there with just my dogs but am staying at my Dads for a while as my weight is dropping quite quickly from all the stress.
I have an old pension from years ago which isn't very much....about 2000pounds.
I don't have any income because I lost my job where I kept vomitting from stress at work.
His income is approximately 40,000.Thanks for your help I just don't know what to do as I can't afford to divorce him. I know he has a few thousand in savings where his bank made a mistake and didn't take the money out when he paid for our holiday 8 weeks ago.Jane

Thank you. As part of the divorce you will need to reach a financial settlement, initially this should be attempted through mediation - you can find independent mediators here: If a settlement is agreed this can be submitted to court under a consent order (together with a D81 form outlining your respective financial positions).

If mediation does not progress you should then proceed with an application to court under Form A for financial relief once the divorce petition has been issued.

You will both need to provide each other with full and frank financial and income disclosure, as well as disclosure of your reasonable needs. The Court's starting point is a 50-50 split of all matrimonial assets and ensuring that both your needs are met in relation to both assets and income. For your information the criteria considered by the court in these matters is:

1. The income, earning capacity, property and other financial resources which each of the parties to the marriage has or is likely to have in the foreseeable future, including in the case of earning capacity any increase in that capacity which it would in the opinion of the court be reasonable to expect a party to the marriage to take steps to acquire;
2. The financial needs, obligations and responsibilities which each of the parties to the marriage has or is likely to have in the foreseeable future;
3. The standard of living enjoyed by the family before the breakdown of the marriage;
4. The age of each party to the marriage and the duration of the marriage;
5. Any physical or mental disability of either of the parties to the marriage;
6. The contributions which each of the parties has made or is likely in the foreseeable future to make to the welfare of the family, including any contribution by looking after the home or caring for the family;
7. The conduct of each of the parties, if that conduct is such that it would in the opinion of the court be inequitable to disregard it;
8. In the case of proceedings for divorce or nullity of marriage, the value to each of the parties to the marriage of any benefit which, by reason of the dissolution or annulment of the marriage, that party will lose the chance of acquiring.

If you have any further questions regarding this please let me know. In the meantime if you found this information helpful please provide a positive rating using the stars at the top of this page. I will not be credited for answering your question without a positive rating. Thank you

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