Welcome to Just Answer.
I am a Solicitor and will assist you.
I am sorry to hear about what has happened.
The courts view in respect of your children is that it is your childrens right to be able to have a relationship with both of thier parents unless it is unsafe to do so. The court will not consider an affair as an unsafe reason. That being said - it is a consideration of the court in respect of the emotional impact on your children and it is likley that things are raw at the moment.
In reality - in respect of your eldest child - she is of an age where she can decide what to do. If she doesnt want to spend time with her father - then it is highly unlikely that a court would make an order that she has to do so - given her curren wishes and feelings. It may be best in respect of your eldest daughter to just leave the dor open for her - explan that she can see her father when she is ready.
In respect of your youngest child - the courts would expect you to encourage a relationship between this child and their father.
If matters cant be agreed then then father can make an application to a family court for a child arrangement order to spend time with your youngest. The court would consider the emotional impact on your youngest but contact would likely order that contact take place.
Before the father can appy to court he would have to refer this to mediation first. Mediaion is a good way of trying to talk through matters and reach an agreement in the best interests of your children. The mediator may be able to facilitate separate appointments if you dont want to meet in person.
You can also self refer to mediation. There are lots of mediation services and there will be one local to you. Just google family mediaton in your area and give them a call to get the ball rolling.
Let me know if I can help you further.
Please kindly remember to star rate our service so that we receive credit for helping you today