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ukfamilysolicitor, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1484
Experience:  Divorce, Finances, Children, Domestic Violence, Care Proceedings
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My husbands son, aged 12 has moved in with us with agreement

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My husbands son, aged 12 has moved in with us with agreement from his mum. We have agreed access and visitation every other weekend. As was the case prior to him moving in. Is it our responsibility to drive him the 100 miles plus to drop him off with his mum and then collect him again?


Welcome to Just Answer

I am a Solicitor and will assist you.

Please may I ask:

- who did the travel before?

- what was the reason for the change in residence?

- any current court orders in place?

- does the mother have the means to travel?

kind regards


Customer: replied 10 months ago.
We travelled to collect and drop off prior to the move
Son not happy living with mum and current partner due to a hostile and volatile environment
No court orders, we have tried to keep everything civil
She does not drive but has close family members who do and her current partner drives
We cannot drop off and collect as husband works long hours and would mean our other children having their bedtime disrupted as I would have to collect and drop off


Thank you for your response.

There is no set rule / law in relation to pick up and drop offs.

If a court was to adjudicate on the travel - then courts often make the decision that the travel should be split. Usually it would be the person picking up for the commencement of their time ie the mother collecting and the father picking back up. This is often seen as fair. There is quite a distance involved and therefore I am inclined to say that a court would adjudicate that this should be split.

Whilst I note that it was not part of your original question, I do note that the mothers home has been described as a hostile and volatile environment. Whilst I do not know the specific details, it is important that your husban's son is safeguarded. At 12, he will be able to communicate what is happening. The courts do consider that both parents are equal and it is a child's right to a good relationship with both of their parent, but this is subject to the proviso that it is safe to do so.

If something was to happen, you might have to consider referring to social services to make sure that the child is safeguarded.

Mediation is worth considering, if matter remain somewhat amicable. This might help resolve the pick up / drop off issue without the need for court.

kind regards


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Customer: replied 10 months ago.
Thank you for your reply. Very helpful.

Glad I could help. If I can assist further please do not hesitate to ask. kind regards