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James Mather
James Mather,
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 1390
Experience:  Senior Partner at Berkson Wallace
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My wife became convinced in the midst of postnatal

Customer Question

My wife became convinced in the midst of postnatal depression that I would abandon her. She was adopted out of an orphanage and this is a recurrent them in her life. She was called by our daycare provider and asked to take our daughter to the hospital, and refused 3 times, taking 2.5 hours to make a 1/2 hour trip. Our daughter came home with a cast, and my wife lied about what happened. The rest of the week she seemed to be deeper and deeper into depression and on the Friday morning I mentioned I was chatting to daycare, and she flipped, i told her that I need an appointment with her and a GP to discuss what was going on, her going on and off medication her constantly making serious errors with the girls. That night I was arrested for breaking my daughters arm, for other acts of cruelty to both my wife and my daughter.I was held and questioned for 24 hours, while she cleared the house, and closed down a business that was making a fortune, giving away and selling all contracts, stock , equipment.Her best friend, who is a social worker, was head of local child services and that made things tough. This started on Aug 1st. She has tried and failed to take 3 non mol orders, and has tried and failed to be allowed to leave the country. She moved to a different city, which was good, different social workers, and case moved to high court. Social services have granted me unsupervised but monitored visitation, for 1.5 hours per week. She refused but judge grated.Now, she told a huge list of lies, and the social work/police report state that she cannot be relied upon and that my version/ records/data show to be true.She has been hostile in refusing access to my 3 daughters, all of which are under 5, even though I was the primary carer, doing all house work, all collections/drop offs, all doctors visits and appointments, all shopping etc.We are due in court again in early December.Since then she has had an internationally, convicted drug dealer who was hunted by interpol, fbi and police and sentenced to 7 years, and is currently out on licence, staying overnight on a regular basis.She has had two "relatives" extended members of her birth family, who she has never me and know nothing about, both male, staying on separate occasions for 2 weeks each, and a whole list of others staying for nights/weekends/weeks.This is in a 2 bed house with 3 daughters under the age of 5.My daughter told me yesterday in visit, that mummy said the house was hers and I was only the builder, and she started telling me that I had to move out so she could go to a better school and have a garden. She kept saying these types of statements, and 3 times she told me that mommy said she should say it.In addition, my other daughter would walk into visits and say, as soon as she got through the door, in front of the social worker, no slapping daddy, no slapping, like she was excited, and then sit on my lap and ask if she can stay with me.I am now convinced that my wife does not have our daughters best interests at heart, will allow anything and anyone into their lives , and that it is just a matter of time before a similar incident happens such as my daughter not being taken to hospital, etc.So far we have filed nothing, but simply responded. I would like full custody, and wish my wife to have visits as often, for as long as she and the girls want. I want in no way to hinder their relationship with their mother, but feel she is not best placed to care for them alone.How should I proceed?
Submitted: 4 months ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 4 months ago.


Welcome to Just Answer

I am a Solicitor and will assist you.

Please may I ask:

- are the current proceedings privale law proceedings or public law proceedings (brought by the local authority)?

- what is the current involvement level of social services?

- what is the purpose of the next hearing?

kind regards


Expert:  ukfamilysolicitor replied 4 months ago.

Sorry I just noticed your location. I am a Solicitor in England and will opt out so that one of my colleagues can assist you.

Customer: replied 4 months ago.
Private, brought by us, in the high court having been moved from family court. Social services are involved so much as they are facilitating visitation, but have questions relating to our relationship, but none relating to parenting, although my wife told them and I admitted to using cannabis so I get random drug tests. No issue with alcohol or drugs.The next hearing is believe is to discuss my wife wishing to take kids to America on "holiday", to view psychiatric reports ad medical evidence, and to discuss the C2 application that is ongoing. What I really want to know is how I get the system to place the girls "in my care" with me being responsible for medical, school, day to day issues so that nothing goes wrong. But her being able to see them as often as she wants, within reason and considering their wellbeing. I want my girls to have a full life with their mother, I just do not trust her judgment or ability to fully provide for their needs.
Expert:  Clare replied 4 months ago.

My name is ***** ***** I shall do my best to help you

Have Social Services raised any concerns about the safety of the children when in her care?

Customer: replied 4 months ago.
Hi Clare, none.
Expert:  Clare replied 4 months ago.

What does the psychiatric report show?