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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare, Family Solicitor
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 35037
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practise since 1985 and have specialised in Family Law for the last 10 years
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I’m trying to sort out a financial part of my divorce, after

Customer Question

I’m trying to sort out a financial part of my divorce, after 5 years separated and his refusal to exchange forme’s im now not sure what I can do. Two years ago we. Went to mediation. 1 appointment, I was I’ll, insure why and after booking a 2nd appointment I had to cancel as I was admitted into hospital and diagnosed with aggressive ms. After I had to stop working completely as I am now unable to work, luckily I’ve got disability cover , which is half my salary, so now I’m on 11,000 a year, no private pension and when I retire my disability cover stops. His position is he’s on £80,000 a year tax free, as he’s a cruise ship staff captain and he gets an annual bonus of 11,000 a year tax free. I moved into a house that needed full renovation when we split. He agreed to pay the mortgage and my council tax while financials not sorted out. We sold our martial game with an equity of £85,000 equity , which he’s only paid me £20,000 of my share of that . Currently he finally made a proposal that he would pay the rest of my equity of £20,000 and that he would pay my mortgage . Only if he gets a 3 rd share of my House equity, I haven’t agreed to it and in the last few months he’s used his equity to reduce the mortgage and his payments. My fear. Is if and when I get more I’ll he gets his 3rd and I will be I’ll and trying to find a home for my needs a third less, which will be hard. Also when I hit pension age I have no savings or income and need to sort out how to survive. He said if he does the 3 rd. share goes to his inheritors, which recently he remarried. I had savings and a. 12,000 inheritance from my grandad. All my savings and when I did work what I had left after my bills went to renovate my house . It was a full renovation project and I used everything I had to secure my house to make it secure, liveable and a home. What should I do. My house is in both names and he wants to use it as an investment and to secure the divorce and agree not to see his financials and touch his large pension?
Assistant: Where are you located? It matters because laws vary by location.
Customer: I live in Holbury southampton
Assistant: Has anything been filed or reported?
Customer: Just the absolute he filed 6 weeks after I greed to divorce him.
Assistant: Anything else you want the solicitor to know before I connect you?
Customer: Don’t think so. The stress of all this is exacerbating my condition and to have more permanent damage and more relapses over the stress of this is scaring me
Submitted: 4 months ago.
Category: Family Law
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
My property is now got a £57,000 mortgage
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
I can’t afford a solicitor for court, luckily I have a friend who is a paralegal who offered to do paperwork and go with me if it ends up in court, what will happen ? He won’t give me a land address in the uk. I know where he works currently.
Expert:  Clare replied 4 months ago.

Thank you for your question

My name is Clare

I shall do my best to help you but I need some further information first

How long were you living together and are there any children involved?

When was the last mediation?

What is the value of all the assets?

Customer: replied 4 months ago.
We were together for 10years and no kids, last mediation
9th nov 2016 . The only assets I know of completely is my house which is now worth 195,000 and the equity from our marital home which was £85.000 his pension is a large dutch pension and a private pension of at least £2000 a month, I have 12,000 savings, from some of the equity of the sale, I’ve only had £20,000 of it, I don’t know his savings or other assets he has
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
Sorry mediation when we met was sept 2015
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
The last letter from then was nov 2016
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
He earns 80,000 tax free a year works 6 months on ship and 6 months off. He doesn’t pay for living, food whilst onboard
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
I currently am unable to work, I pay all the bills of the house and I used all my savings to renovate my house to a living standard
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
used some of the equity of marriage House to sort out some important jobs on the House
Customer: replied 4 months ago.
I did see a solicitor , he said without the exchange of formed he could do nothing
Expert:  Clare replied 4 months ago.


The way forward is for you t attend a further Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting with a family mediator - just you.

Once they certify that mediation is not suitable then you need to file a Form A with the Court - it is here

The fee is £245.

Once that is issued you will be locked into a court timetable for filing documents - and if your ex misses those then you can threaten him with prison.

Once it is underway you may wish to use a solicitor - or you can continue yourself.

I hope that this is of assistance - please ask if you need further details