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Thomas Judge
Thomas Judge, Family Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 33970
Experience:  Over twenty-five years experience
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I have a son who lives with his mom but for years now does

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I have a son who lives with his mom but for years now does not get on with his mum's husband. He is always in tears and unhappy. The guy swears at him and treats him differently from their other kids. I have mediated and resolved these types of issues in the past but after a while they resurface and it is beginning to affect my son. How can I help his situation? I am in a position to take him to live with me. But am not sure if his mom would want to let go. She cries each time this happens and totally helpless with the situation as well. I just need some advice on the best approach to make things ok for my son so this situation does not affect him as an individual.

How old is he?

Customer: replied 3 months ago.
he is 12 years old
Customer: replied 3 months ago.
is it possible to text to begin with just to minimise my cost at this stage

Thats absolutely fine. The best thing is to find if the 12 year old wants to live with you or your son. Then if he does you can make an application to the court for a child arrangements order so that he can live with either of you. The court will investigate the concerns and come to a decision as to where is best/safe for him. I have attached a link to a very helpful book on amazon for about a tenner which explains the process - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Represent-Yourself-Family-Court-understanding/dp/147211910X

Happy to discuss and please rate 4 or 5 stars.

Hello I see that you have looked at the answer. Could you please let me know if it has answered your original question? You can either reply on here with a quick ‘Yes, thanks’, or select 3, 4 or 5 stars on this page.This is how Justanswer works. I can still answer follow up questions if needed to clarify anything for you. Many thanks

Customer: replied 3 months ago.
Apologies yes i was trying to read about child arrangement orders. am not sure. My son always says he wants to live with me and its always painful to see him sad when he goes back to his mum. i know he loves his mum the issue is his relationship with his mums husband which is not good. Is there an allowance in the law where he can live with me and go visit his mum just the way i have been doing? is it through the child arrangement orders you talked about?i have tried to mediate so they can live harmonously.The other question at the back of my mind is at what age would he be able to make a decision in the eyes of the law that does not involve going to the courts ?

There is no specific age - the court should always consider the child's wishes and feelings - however once they get t0 12 or 13 they are more often voting with their feet - leaving home or refusing to go to contact - as such their voices are louder. Please remember to rate 4 or 5 stars. The book should help. They are child arrangement orders and they allow him to live with you and spend time with his mother

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