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If you need make an application for a pension sharing order, you would do this via a form A:
As the application will be one where the outcome is based on the valuation, the length of your marriage etc - it should be able to be determined without you having to attend court, but if you were needed to take part in a hearing you could do so via telephone if needed.
Can I clarify anything?
It is my understanding that you apply for a pension order whether it's an armed forces pension or not.
Here is some more general information - https://www.gov.uk/guidance/pensions-and-compensation-for-veterans#a-world-class-pension-scheme-for-your-military-service
I can't calculate the share for you, it will depend on the length of the marriage and the length of service, obviously.
The UK pensions advisory service may assist with this though: https://www.pensionsadvisoryservice.org.uk/
In terms of costs - the form costs £255 to file.
There are no further costs as you don't necessarily need a solicitor for this process. But legal aid would not be an option I'm afraid.
I hope this clarifies things?
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Mediation should be exempt as you are out of the jurisdiction.
It's one application for all pensions.
The court will issue directions for the filing of the relevant paperwork.