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SASH_Law
SASH_Law, Family Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 6018
Experience:  LLB (Hons)
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I have a couple of questions around trying to establish

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Hi, i have a couple of questions around trying to establish joint custody / living arrangements for by two boys
JA: Do you agree about joint custody?
Customer: I do, their mother does not exactly
JA: Has a custody order been entered or modified?
Customer: no. nothing has been done formally with either arrangements or with child maintenance
JA: Is there anything else the Lawyer should know before I connect you? Rest assured that they'll be able to help you.
Customer: we have had an informal arrangement since separation about three years ago and she took an age to go through the divorce process, so i have only just now been able to purchase a property capable of having the boys

Hello, how are you today?



My name is ***** ***** I am going to see if I can assist with your query. Let me just read your first post. I may need to ask you additional questions after I have read it, and if I do, they will appear in my next response. It is important you answer all the questions I ask, so that I have the information I need to give you an accurate response.


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How old are the children?

Who has been their main carer?

Customer: replied 15 days ago.
Hi, they are 14 and 10
Their mum has although I have had regular access
Customer: replied 15 days ago.
She is currently saying that there is no need to change the current arrangements even though I have always been open about my desire and intention to have 50/50 care once I had a house.
Is there a distance between parent households that gives her more of a sway in the arguememt and is it simply down to her to agree or disagree?

How far is your property from their schools?

Customer: replied 15 days ago.
Just over 50 miles I think although can be done by main line train as well

And how far is that in terms of hours and minutes in rush hour?

Customer: replied 15 days ago.
It should take about an hour based on some trials. My mum is also much closer and will take some of the collections/drop offs to help timings
How far are the schools from their home?
Customer: replied 15 days ago.
From their mum? A couple of miles for one, five for the other

Okay, so living with you for 50% of the time would be a massive change to their daily routine.  In my view it is doubtful that the court would consider a 50/50 shared arrangement in these circumstances, as it will be a bind for the kids to have that level of travel on weekdays.

That said, it never ceases to amaze me as to what some judges/magistrates will order, so if you and the mother cannot come to an agreement between you, and mediation also fails to help you come to an agreement, your final option is to apply to court and see what a judge/mags have to say about it.

Bear in mind that the court is supposed to have the children's best interests as paramount (which is why I say on the info you have given, a 50/50 shared care order is unlikely), so your application may fail on that basis.  Also, at 14  years of age,  your older child's views will be determinative to the courts - the younger child's views will be of interest, but not determinative.

If you and the mother have managed thus far amicably without the use of the courts, I would strongly suggest that you continue to try to do that, as court has a tendency to make people say things that they would not normally have raised.  Mediators are a great help, and much cheaper than going to court with lawyers.

Customer: replied 15 days ago.
Ok thanks.
Customer: replied 15 days ago.
Can I also ask some child maintenance questions ?

We can only answer one topic per thread.

If you have new questions and wish to ask for my assistance, you can do so by putting FORCustomerONLY in the subject heading, or, once you have rated this question you will be able to add me as a favourite expert from your membership page. When you wish to ask me another query, you can then simply type “@“ followed by my name in your next chat, e.g. @SASH_Law. 


SASH_Law and other Family Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 15 days ago.
Ok thanks

You're very welcome.

Glad I could assist.

If you have new questions and wish to ask for my assistance, you can do so by putting FORCustomerONLY in the subject heading, or, once you have rated this question you will be able to add me as a favourite expert from your membership page. When you wish to ask me another query, you can then simply type “@“ followed by my name in your next chat, e.g. @SASH_Law. 



All the best!