How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site. Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • Go back-and-forth until satisfied
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask SASH_Law Your Own Question
SASH_Law, Family Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 6178
Experience:  LLB (Hons)
Type Your Family Law Question Here...
SASH_Law is online now

I am divorcing my husband of almost 6 years after

Customer Question

Hi, I am divorcing my husband of almost 6 years after discovering a 3 year affair. We have 2 young children - ages 4 and 2 - and I have stayed home to look after them. We have a matrimonial home. He earns 90,000 pa. I want to push for 80/20 split. Is this realistic? At the moment we are trying to work it out instead of going through solicitors. Thanks.
JA: Was the home purchased during the marriage?
Customer: Yes Although we had a home together previously too. We have been together 18 years. Mortaged together for 14 years.
JA: Were any marital funds used for the mortgage or property improvements?
Customer: My parents gave me 50,000 to improve the property. We also took out a 100,000 second mortgage.
JA: Is there anything else the Lawyer should know before I connect you? Rest assured that they'll be able to help you.
Customer: I don't think so
Submitted: 18 days ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 18 days ago.

Hello, how are you today? 

My name is ***** ***** I am going to see if I can assist with your query. Let me just read your first post. I may need to ask you additional questions after I have read it, and if I do, they will appear below. It is important you answer all the questions I ask, so that I have the information I need to give you an accurate response. JA is a Q&A website, and this ‘chat’ is email based, which means responses may not be immediate. Do rest assured however, that I will be providing you with an answer to your query today.

The site will offer a phone call, this is automated and it is important for you to know that I do not make calls. I will answer your query online.

Please confirm that you have read and understood this message and then we can begin.

Customer: replied 18 days ago.
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 18 days ago.

Is he in agreement with the 80/20 split?

Customer: replied 18 days ago.
Customer: replied 18 days ago.
He think a 70/30 is fairer but I don't work, he has a high income, and the children - who will live with me full time - are only 4 and 2
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 18 days ago.

Unfortunately it's not going to be possible for anyone to tell you, without sight of the full financial disclosure from both of you, whether an 80/20 split is realistic or not.  What I can tell you follows.

The starting point for the sharing of assets in a mid to long term marriage (cohabitation before the marriage is included in calculating the length of the relationship) is 50/50 of all assets accrued during the marriage. The court would typically look at the needs of each party, the needs of any minor children of the marriage, and the factors as listed in s25 of the Matrimonial Causes Act 1973, which I will link to below.  The children's need for continued housing until their majority will be a primary factor.

If your name is ***** ***** the house deeds, the first thing you should do is to register your home rights. See here for the form and guidance:

It is important to note that the finances will only be reviewed by the court after the decree nisi (now called ‘conditional order’) has been granted, and will only take effect after the decree absolute (now called ‘final order’).

You will need to attend mediation (see link below on where to find a mediator) before you can make the application to court in any case, and can therefore agree everything ahead of the time to make the application to court. If you can agree, you can get a consent order drawn up, and the court will then seal that as a consent order (i.e. an agreement between you). Sealing the order makes it enforceable. If you cannot get agreement for a consent order, one of you will need to apply to court on Form A, and the court will list the matter for a hearing to see if a Judge can help you agree. If you still cannot agree, the matter will be set down for a new Judge to decide how to split the assets.

You will both also need to complete full financial disclosure, so each of you, and ultimately the judge, can see what assets there are and what is available to share. This includes everything from savings, property to pensions etc.

Until you each have full disclosure it is impossible to say what the likely outcome will be, but as stated above, the starting point for a long marriage is 50/50.

Find a mediator:

Section 25:

Form A:

Form E:

Customer: replied 18 days ago.
ok thanks
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 18 days ago.

Can I clarify anything for you?

Customer: replied 18 days ago.
How much does it cost to go to mediation? And Court? please
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 18 days ago.

Each mediator charges their own fees - so you will need to check with the one you choose, as with lawyers, their fees vary.

The court applications have varying fees from £593 for the divorce application, £53 for an agreed consent order, or £275 for a financial application.  Of course, solicitors fees can be added to that if you instruct one, and can vary from £150+VAT per hour up and over £500+VAT per hour - depends on who you choose.

Expert:  SASH_Law replied 18 days ago.

If you have new questions and wish to ask for my assistance, you can do so by putting FORCustomerONLY in the subject heading of a new thread. Alternatively, once you have rated this question, you will get the option to add me as a favourite expert from your membership page. Then, when you wish to ask me another query, you can then simply type “@“ followed by my name in your next chat, e.g. @SASH_Law.

Please note that there is no need to respond to this message.

Thanks for using JA!

All the best!

Customer: replied 18 days ago.
Do arrears on the mortgage come into consideration if I were to keep the matrimonial home and take on the mortgage? i.e. can the arrears be split and included in the overall split so I don't have to take them on myself?
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 18 days ago.

That will be a matter for the court to decide.