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SASH_Law
SASH_Law, Family Lawyer
Category: Family Law
Satisfied Customers: 6368
Experience:  LLB (Hons)
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Am i allowed to ask for mediation to speed up a financial

Customer Question

Am i allowed to ask for mediation to speed up a financial agreement with ex wife even though she got got solicitor acting for her? And what can i do if she refuses?
Submitted: 10 days ago.
Category: Family Law
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

Hello, how are you today? 



My name is Lea. It would be nice if you could let me know your name, so that I know who I am talking to. I am going to see if I can assist with your query. I may need to ask you additional questions and it is important for you to answer all the questions clearly, so that I have the information I need to give you an accurate response for your specific legal situation. JA is a Q&A website, and this ‘chat’ is email based, which means responses may not be immediate. Do rest assured however, that I will be providing you with an answer to your query today.


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Please confirm that you have read and understood this message and then we can begin.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
Hi my name is ***** ***** im good thanks how are you? And i have read and understood message
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

Hello Karl

You can certainly ask to use a mediator, who will be independent of both of you and therefore impatial and able to help you both reach an agreement for a consent order if your ex engages with the process.  But your ex doesn't have to agree to mediation.

If you cannot get agreement for a consent order with the help of a mediator, one of you will need to apply to court on Form A, and the court will list the matter for a hearing to see if a Judge can help you agree.

If you still cannot agree, the matter will be set down for a new Judge to decide how to split the assets. You will both also need to complete full financial disclosure, so each of you, and ultimately the judge, can see what assets there are and what is available to share. This includes everything from savings, property to pensions etc.

Until you each have full disclosure it is impossible to say what the potential outcome will be, but as stated above, the starting point for a long marriage is 50/50. There is no magic formula to use, just the law as described and the judge’s absolute discretion on the final decision based on that law.

Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

The following links will assist you.

Find a mediator: www.familymediationcouncil.org.uk

Section 25: https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1973/18/section/25/1997-06-19?timeline=true

Form A: https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/form-a-notice-of-intention-to-proceed-with-an-application-for-a-financial-order

Form E: https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/953463/form-e-eng.pdf

Find a solicitor: solicitors.lawsociety.org.uk

Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

Can I clarify anything for you Karl?

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
OK thank you! Ive been trying to obtain a financial agreement with her since November and she instructed solicitors in March and i have been waiting 3 weeks for her to give me a date to mutually exchange financial disclosure so we can negotiate a settlement but yesterday when my house was due to complete sale my conveyance solicitor said that they had received a letter from my ex wife solicitor asking not to release the funds until a court order in place and now she is saying we can discuss end of August? Even though we agreed that i would use half the sale for a deposit on my new house and her half in an account till court order so is there anything i can do to speed the process up as i need my half? Thanks
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

Mediation is probably the quickest route.  Otherwise it is court, as described above.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
Would mediation help calculate pension split? If not how would it be calculated? Thanks
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

You need full financial disclosure before a solicitor will be able to give you an assessment on how things may be split by a judge - and that solicitor will have to review all the disclosure first.

See my paragraph above starting with 'Until you each have full disclosure...'

Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

A mediator is there to help you agree, not decide on the split of the assets.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
I have my full financial disclosure ready to exchange however she keeps delaying hers? Is there an acceptable time frame for me to wait? And now the house money is being held and she lives with her new partner she doesnt appear to be in a rush to access her share while she knows i need my share so isnt rushing to engage with me to agree a settlement? Is there anything i can do or do i have to just wait? Thanks
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

If she's delaying, apply to court - the court will set the timetable.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
in your experience what would that timetable look like? Does the fact the main reason i had to buy a new home was because she left me and our 2 children so have been their sole career for nearly 3 years and needed a bigger home make a difference? Thanks
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

The time frames will be fairly rigid once you've actually applied to court, but I cannot tell you exactly what yours will be, as different courts have different backlogs. Perhaps try telling your ex that if she doesn't exchange in 7 days (as she's had months already), that you will apply to court and ask for your costs. Might help her get on with it.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
Ok thank you sounds like im up against a rock and hard place and still ended up holding the kids haha thanks
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

Yes, it's a horribly lengthy process when one party simply chooses not to engage.  But if you do have to go to court, make sure you ask for your costs as she is being unreasonable in not exchanging documents.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
Im assuming the courts wont look favourably on her for being like this especially when ive always willing to split everything evenly? Or do they not care and just go off the financial info? Thanks
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

It's an exercise in splitting the assets fairly, most conduct doesn't have an impact, except on costs.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
How is fairly decided?
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

It's an exercise of the law and the judge's discretion, as explained above.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
Ok thank you
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

You're welcome.

Customer: replied 10 days ago.
Last question…under section 25 it states…. first consideration being given to the welfare while a minor of any child of the family who has not attained the age of eighteen. IWell in this case the welfare of the kids is on me as they are both under 18 and i need a settlement and my share of sale for our new house? Is this only relevant if we end up in court or can i msg her solicitor and use that to ask them to persuade her to get a move on? Thanks
Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

I suspect only court will make her move on, but you're free to mention whatever you wish if you think it might persuade her.

Have a good evening.

Expert:  SASH_Law replied 10 days ago.

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