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Peter Collins
Peter Collins,
Category: Republic of Ireland Law
Satisfied Customers: 6430
Experience:  Barrister at Self Employed
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I have a question on family law - I am divorced and primary

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I have a question on family law - I am divorced and primary carer of the children - My ex has broken the Divorce Consent Order on many counts - my question is this: If I leave the children with their father for 1 week as I am exhausted am I putting myself in difficult situation if I return to court? Hope that makes sense...
JA: What steps have you taken? Have you filed any papers in family court?
Customer: Not yet....
JA: Family Court normally sits in a local County and Magistrates' Court. Do you know the location of the court? If not, what county do you live in?
Customer: I know the location of the court - I just need to know if my action will effect any decision made by the court later
JA: Anything else you want the Lawyer to know before I connect you?
Customer: No thank you

Hello, my name is ***** ***** I’ll do my best to assist you today.

Please bear in mind as this is an email service and not live chat I may not respond immediately.

I'm just reviewing your question.

Can you clarify - what is the current contact arrangement with their father, is there a court order in place and how much time does he have with them?

What are you proposing to leave them with him for a week? Is it just a week away you are looking for at this stage?

Customer: replied 5 months ago.
Court Order in place. Access every 2nd weekend and some school holidays. However, he has not respected the holidays access e.g. this Christmas or last Oct midterm break. He has not paid his 50% of children's expenses etc. I was planning to go away for 1 week to take a break, informing him and the children in advance of course.

Does the order provide for him to have extended holiday contact or for amendment to the overall plan in the order to be made by agreement between you?

Customer: replied 5 months ago.
but the problem I have is that he refuses to take his children for different reasons. I am sure he will not want them for the week I plan to leave, but I was going to leave them with him anyway.

OK. You can't simply leave them without his consent. Particularly if the court order does not provide for this.

Do you have other family members that might have the children for a week so you can take a break?

Customer: replied 5 months ago.
No, so I take it I am then also breaking the court order which puts in a weaker position if I return to court?

It doesn't place you in a weaker position if he is not looking to have more time with the children, which it very much sounds like he is not.

In my view you just have to be firm about the week that you will be away.

Customer: replied 5 months ago.
Okay, thank you for your advice, yes I am struggling with 4 children, one with special needs and their father is not honoring the access schedule put in place. Thanks again

My pleasure.

If you have further questions, you can always come back to me.

In the meantime, if you could take a second to provide a 5 star rating (at the top right of your screen), I'll be credited for my time spent responding to your question.

Kind regards,


Peter Collins and other Republic of Ireland Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 5 months ago.
will do....

Thanks - it's appreciated.

Customer: replied 5 months ago.
Hello Peter, my ex has the children this weekend and I have stressed that I need a break next week but as usual he declines to have them. He reminded me that going forward he will not take the children any longer for school holidays so ultimately I need to go back to court again to renegotiate everything put in place. I am leaving tomorrow after the children go with their father and I have decided that I am not returning until he pays the children's expenses owed to me and honors the court order put in place after waiting 6 long years for settlement. I am informing the children of my plan and my reasons and will reassure them that I will keep contact and return shortly. I am also informing their father. I am desperate and mentally exhausted. Where does that leave me legally?

It doesn't leave you anywhere legally other than appearing as you are - exhausted, at your wits end and trying to get something out of their father. He is not seeking full custody so it doesn't generally undermine your position, except in so far as the fact you are doing this without consent and NOW rather than applying to court for the arrangement to be dealt with does not suggest a child focussed approach.