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Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 35089
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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I am now 70 years of age, on a modest pension since I retired

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I am now 70 years of age, on a modest pension since I retired some years ago and I have been sharing the house of a family friend some years older than I am, for nearly 20 years. From the outset I have paid a modest rent to her, in other words I pay my way and a bit more. Over the years she has become more and more unwell on and off and the relationship between us has changed from one of friendship to one where we are still friends but I have had to take on more and more of a companion/carer role. Recently she was very unwell for 2 months and I looked after her during that time, including driving her to A&E several times during the night, cooking, cleaning, etc. i.e. all the household chores and walking her dog. I fact I more or less put my own life on hold for the duration. When she is not unwell, she still expects me to be around for her a lot and makes me feel as if I shouldn't really be going out too much and leaving her on her own. In effect, I feel I am being used as a companion/carer, but paying for the privilege instead of the other way round.

My question is, how do I stand in law were I to take this up with the person concerned?
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Do you wish to remain in the property?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Yes I do wish to remain in the property. I also wish to remain friends with the person concerned and to be helpful to her but at the moment I am feeling taken for granted and taken advantage of.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

Yes I do. I also wish to remain friends with the person concerned and to help her too. The problem is that I seem to have done so much that she takes it for granted and I now feel trapped in an intolerable situation.


I should also mention that she told me that I am her main beneficiary of her Will and this has made me feel beholden to her and I believe she thinks I owe her all I am expected to do because of this promise.


Thanks for your offer of help. I look forward to your response.



Customer: replied 4 years ago.

This is the third time I have tried to reply but my response does not seem to be getting through. Please could you advise me what to do?

My apologies for the delay
You have asked for legal assistance with this when in fact this is not really a legal problem
Legally if you wish to remain in the property then you either continue to pay the rent or you negotiate a different arrangement.
If your friend does not wish to alter the rental agreement then your choices are to leave; or to remain but withdraw from some of the caring
You could potentially achieve this by speaking to Social Services to discover what assistance might be available from them.
This is a matter for negotiation with your friend.
You may wish to ask someone else to assist in this to help your friend understand how you feel
Legally however the position is bleakly straightforward
Please ask if you need further information
Clare and other Law Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
May I ask Clare a further question please. It is this: Having shared the house of my friend for 20 years, paying my share of the bills and rent, plus acting in effect as a companion and sometimes carer, do I have any claim in law to a proportion of the value of the house?
No I am afraid not - although you would have done so had you been in a relationship with each other