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Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 71042
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice
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I have evidence that I found in my ex partners account that

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I have evidence that I found in my ex partners account that I would like to use to prove things I am saying are true in pre proceedings meeting for our child.
I was able to access them because I set up the account and set up the password.

Thank you for your question. My name is ***** ***** I will try to help with this.

Are you asking if this is an offence?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

well it proves things i am saying but i do believe it to be an what could happen?


It is an offence.

Its a contravention under the Computer Misuse Act and they probably would act against you. Its not hacking because you do have his password.

The difficulty would be that the evidence would probably be disallowed because you came by it in an unlawful way I'm afraid.

I'm very sorry if this is bad news.

Can I clarify anything for you?

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

you say "probably"


WHO could act against me? my partner or SS or both??


I have already shown it to them ages ago........but they sadly seem to be a special breed of liars themselves!!!


I am fighting tooth and nail to not allow my emotionally abusive ex access to our son and the mails prove beyond doubt that he has lied to the SS and that his priorities do NOT lie with our son, who is severely disabled and i am the main carer. The SS are involved because he has refused to come to an agreement with me re care after FIVE YEARS SINCE I ENDED THE RELATIONSHIP........


what is the worst sentence etc i could this point i am beyond caring what happens to me!!


I other say "probably" "not likely"

Under what circumstance would it be understandable to use?



No. The police. Its a criminal offence.

He would have to report it. Its not all that likely that a court would report it.

I am really sorry but its very unlikely that the Court will allow you to disrupt contact.

The maximum sentence is 6 months custody and an unlimited fine although obviously that is unlikely. Most likely it would just be a fine or community order.

But the evidence will be disallowed because you came by it unlawfully. I cannot think of a basis to introduce it. Courts do allow evidence that was obtained by criminal actions.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

so even though this man will NEVER STOP making the life of his sons main carers life HELL.....I have PTSD and sleep deprivation. I have been completely traumatised by the last five years of rubbish. HE DID ASK me to look in his account at a slightly earlier date for something for him.....


At this point they have enormous amounts of evidence that he is not putting his son first....but this is DEFINITIVE!...and further than that holding MY LIFE to ransom in ways in which the SS are AWARE of.


They are pretending they never saw this evidence and have unbelievably turned on me now.


It is unlikely that they will send to jail a main carer I suppose but I will have a criminal record yes?



The issue is not your welfare but that of your son. The court will take the view that his welfare is best served by having contact with his father and your resistance will be held against you.

You would be much better off making some offer.

You will have a criminal record and I'm afraid the days when you didn't go to prison because you have child care responsibilities are long gone. However, you wouldn't get custody for this anyway.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

The situation for custody has been dealt with ......I have already paid thousands to have that one resolved.

He is messing with the dates/times though (despite what the judge told him who ripped strips off him for his actions.....long story)

He is constantly distressing me and it is NOT in my sons best interests for him to be allowed to do this any more. He will NEVER stop.


So it is either take my son from me to allow him contact in care or keep him out??? He will NEVER stop.


HIS WHOLE remit is to keep me guessing about my longer breaks since I get NO adult life. I am going to pursue action against the SS for breaching my human right.....I believe I have a case. I am sleep deprived AND they will not deal with this lunatic man who ENTIRE REMIT is to make his sons carers life unpredictable and miserable.

No, I meant a custodial sentence.

I am sorry but you are not going to be able to disrupt contact. He may be being unreliable to annoy you. People do that sometimes. It doesn't mean he will not get access to his son.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

so after FIVE YEARS of fighting to get a simple care arrangement in place and thousands of pounds later for me to get WHAT IS IN my sons best interests.....they will TAKE him from me and put him in care just so his father can have access?????

This is not a simple case of messing with care arrangements......he is holding my whole life to using his son as a tool!!!! which i thought was a BAD thing in the eyes of child care!


His new wife has said if I get long enough breaks to see my own partner who lives abroad she will divorce him!!


PLEASE understand that I do NOT want the breaks to see my has been proven that I NEED the breaks fro my sanity and to have a quality of life (the SS have breached laws by not giving me my own carers assessment)

They will do that if you refuse to comply with a Court order. You cannot disrupt contact.

Obviously they will try every other option first but you can certainly lose your residency if you do not allow access in the long run.

I am really sorry and I wish I could give you a different answer but if you are obstructing access then the court's view will be that you are using your son as a tool not him.

I am very sorry.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

no it is HIM that is refusing to comply with the judges rulings for contact.....not me. I do get that if I recommend no contact in my sons best interests that is unlikely....but at this stage see it the only option.


HE is refusing to have his son in line with the judge.

He doesn't have to have contact with his son. Nobody can force him to. Failing to comply will reflect badly upon subsequent applications though.

A court cannot force him to take your son so that you can have breaks I'm afraid.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

yes i know....


Finally (sorry).......


I am following what the judge said.......the judge was so shocked how little my ex wanted his son after being a devoted father for 8 years of his life (because his wife wants nothing to do with his care!) that he tried to get as much contact for me!!........and he told him to do MORE and " examine his conscience!!" (not knowing he does not have one!)


He is being made (so to speak) by me to do about 6-8 days per YEAR more!!! spread out and added to the measly contact he offered


So I am following the judge!

I am not sure how the Judge thinks he can enforce that. Nobody can be forced to have contact although a Judge is free to reproach a person.

In any event, if he doesn't comply with it there are no means of forcing him to do so.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Me neither........he was just reproached badly!!


The SS told ME they are not baby sitters for parents who have better things to do for a couple of days!!


But then LET him phone them and say he CANNOT look after his son for those extra days........WOW...if only all parents could do that!!!


The SS are at fault here not the judge........if they thought he absolutely could NOT look after him I would understand.....but they KNOW FULL WELL that this man is JUST doing it to MESS with me.!!!!


DO you think the SS are acting properly?

I think the difference is that he is not the main carer.

Yes, I'm afraid I do think social services are acting properly.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

I know what you mean. but I do not believe they are acting properly in other ways.

They are totally ignoring my own physical disabilities for which they have proof and they are not giving me any entitlement to any adult life. They were not even aware that I was entitled to my own carers assessment and they are ignoring sleep deprivation because of chronic sleep issues of my son...I believe they are breaching my human rights!! I have a right to SOME life of my own (a FEW weeks of the year!) and I most definitely have a right to sleep!! They are making me get up after two three four to NO hours sleep and have been for two years or more....and it is sending my loopy!! Its all about budgets for them!!

But they will spare no expense on lawyers!

They know HE wont give me the breaks I want (SO little!!) and THEY wont.......and so it goes on......there will be nothing left of me soon!!

But they will then pay foster carers oodles of money to care for my son......and NO ONE will be able to do the sleep patterens that I do!!


They are making me sound like I do NOT WANT MY SON!! when I can provide by my very actions that my son has come first in my life (and so he will always!) I just need some breaks!!! all the breaks that they give me do is allow me to catch up on housework and jobs!!! I can be just as tired when he returns after a couple of days off!!


it is an appalling situation and I am sure my human right are being breached and there are laws about giving carers breaks they WANT yes?


They are creating a situation where i cannot survive and then will take my son......when actually I believe they do NOT HAVE anyone who will do what I do!!


If I COULD do it then I WOULD of course!! But they are destroying me physically and mentally!!


They KNOW I cannt do it...but will not give me the breaks i want and NEED! It is a humans right issue i think........i defy ANY person I know as an adult of reasonable intelligence to watch baby programmes day in day out and not have the chance to sleep?

I'm afraid I cannot agee with that.

Ultimately, you have residence. He is your son and you are tasked with looking after him. If your former partner will not look after him then, unfortunately, its for you to do so unless you can find another willing to help.

its not for social services to step into the breach
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Then what are carers assessments for?? why are breaks offered to carers??

REALLY? I do not have a right to SLEEP???

You do not have a right to expect social services will look after your child I'm afraid.

All parents have disrupted sleep. That is the nature of the relationship. Children keep parents awake. That is not a breach of your human rights
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

so...for carers assessment that I am entitled to by law dictates that I can get help for sleep and other issues re care (my son is ten and a half not a young baby)

then the SS have a truck load medical proof about his sleep problems (breathing for one thing), my agency carers who help me in the mornings testify to all I say and have for over two years,

and then the SS themselves ignore these needs....further than that they MAKE me get up during deep sleep or just getting to sleep every morning (isn't that used as torture method!!), watch me go nuts with this and this is like ANY other parent/child relationship? And they do not have to help me with that? In fact rather than helping me, they actually make it worse by forcing me to get up and not putting in place carers who can let themselves in on mornings when I have had, say, two hours sleep for, say 7 nights in a row? (the carers themselves tell me they can let themselves in to other peoples houses)


They could not even find foster help because THEY would not do the sleep issue stuff!!


All parents have those sorts of sleep issues?....For ten years and beyond?





Yes, thats right.
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