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Ask Clare Your Own Question
Clare, Solicitor
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 34885
Experience:  I have been a solicitor in High Street Practice since 1985 with a wide general experience.
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I understand that what Im asking about is a very complicated

Customer Question

I understand that what I'm asking about is a very complicated issue but some broad guidance would be helpful. I am 45 years old and live in a house with my 88 year old mother who has early stage dementia. The house is JOINTLY owed by both of us with an existing mortgage of £25,000 property value £380,000. I have been self employed for 16 years, working mainly from home. I am finding that more and more of my time is spent as a carer now, this not only prevents me from having any social life but is also seriously restricting my ability to focus on what once was a very successful "one man" business. There is no love lost between us, (she would have had me aborted were it not for a car accident she was involved in). In my ideal world the council would put her in a home and take care of her. I am not a carer, I never signed up to be a carer. I want to know in this situation what legal rights do I have to a quality of life ? The right to earn a living ? A right to be able to pay my debts ? To focus on my work ? I am aware that doctors and local authorities will do everything in their power to NOT spend money.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Are you willing to sell the property?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

No, I want to keep it at all costs. Her half will pass to me when she passes.

Customer: replied 3 years ago.

To be blunt, I believe I don't have any legal responsibility to be her carer and I don't see why my quality of life should be dragged down.

Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Then you have a stark choice.
You are correct you cannot be forced to care for your mother and can notify Social Services and her Doctor that you cannot be considered in any care plan.
However if she goes into a care home before your 60th birthday then the value of her share of the property will be taken account of in the Means test and you will expected to fund the Care Home fees if you wish to avoid a forced sale of the house
If you wish to keep the house then you need to access as much help as is available - respite care etc and then employ a team of carers to relieve you of the responsibility
I am sorry - I am aware that this is not the answer that you are hoping for