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Jo C.
Jo C., Barrister
Category: Law
Satisfied Customers: 32086
Experience:  Over 5 years in practice
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Customer Question

My son is due to go on a two week holiday with his father tomorrow. He has been very anxious and stressed about this holiday as his father does not let him have his comfort blanket as he views he is too old for this ( my son is 7 and uses his muslin to sleep with)
In the past Theo has hid under tables or hides in his room when he is due to be picked up.
I keep reassurance and use only positive words to try and support his feelings. I am an early years professional so I try to uses my knowledge and let Theo speak about how he feels.
His father has a court order for one week holiday a year but I have agreed two weeks as I did not want Theo to miss out.
Do I have any rights as a mother if my son gets distressed and has to be forced into the car to say no to Theo going on the holiday?
His father is very difficult to talk to and can become aggressive.
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Law
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
Thank you for your question.
My name is Clare
I will do my best to help you but I need some further information first.
Have you discussed the issue with his father?
have you considered discreet ways of him taking the muslin?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
Hi, thank you for your response, I have discussed the issue with his father but Theo is so concerned his dad will take it off of him even though his dad said he can take it that he would prefer to leave the muslin at home. I have talked to theo about taking the muzzy hidden inside a teddy bear but he says they will make fun of him if he has it. Theo was upset that I had spoken to his dad about his muzzy so packing it in his case would not be an option.
I am very concerned he is saying he does not want to go on the plane and does not want to go even if he takes his muslin.
Theo struggles with his dads other two children and is increasingly more reluctant to be around his father. I am very concerned he feels his dad doesn't listen to how he feels and he trusts me to listen to him so if I force him to go on this holiday I am concerned he will become even more stressed. He is very advanced in talking about how he feels but is also very shy and sensitive.
Expert:  Clare replied 3 years ago.
How old are the other children?
Customer: replied 3 years ago.
They are two and nine yrs old.
Do I have any rights against an access court order?
Am I obliged to send Theo on holiday if he does not want to go?
I'm aware it is important to see his father but I just want to find out how to reduce access and if I can say no to holidays if Theo does not want to go? He finds two nights every other week too long. What age does a child's voice get listened to?